Yellow Arrow Publishing Blog

Kapua Iao 6/14/22 Kapua Iao 6/14/22

Challenging Truths: A Conversation with Darah Schillinger

“I realize that what we tell ourselves, and what we tell women and children, influences how we think and how we perform,” says Darah Schillinger from her room at St. Mary’s College of Maryland. “And when we keep telling women that they can’t do something, then we are perpetuating the cycle.”

Darah Schillinger, the author of Yellow Arrow Publishing’s next chapbook, when the daffodils die, is passionately explaining the results of a study that she learned about in her “Feminism and Philosophy” class. The study itself is impressive as is Darah’s animated presence as she expresses her desire to support women, putting what she learned into practice. In fact, this study became the inspiration for Darah to write “When Mars and Venus Collide,” included within when the daffodils die. The poem highlights numerous influential women throughout history to now, including Tu Youyou, a chemist who helped find a treatment for malaria, and Susan La Flesche Picotte, the first Native American woman to earn a medical degree. But “When Mars and Venus Collide” is only one example of how Darah uses when the daffodils die to challenge long-standing truths within our society and change perspectives so that her readers can examine the scene from a new angle.

when the daffodils die is now available for PRERELEASE (click here for wholesale prices) and will be released July 12, 2022. Follow Yellow Arrow on Facebook and Instagram for Friday sneak peeks into when the daffodils die. The beautiful yet simplistic cover was created in-house by Creative Director Alexa Laharty after a few conversations with Darah about her vision. Darah notes, “My original design for the cover was simple because my poems tend to focus on finding beauty in the overlooked, and I wanted a simple, yet beautiful cover to reflect that. I also opted to keep the handwritten font (at the editor’s insistence!) because I think it reflects the humanness of poetry. It’s personal, and I wanted it to feel personal the second you see it. I’m thrilled with how the cover turned out. Alexa did a wonderful job bringing my original design to life.”

At the time of this interview with Vignette Managing Editor Siobhan McKenna, Darah was preparing for final exams and her college graduation, but graciously took the time to speak about her path to writing and her forthcoming publication. Within their conversation, they explored the themes that permeate when the daffodils die: humans and their relationships with nature, spirituality, and love.

Growing up in Baltimore County, in Maryland, Darah always loved writing but didn’t see herself becoming a poet. In middle school, she wrote fiction novels because she thought she was going “to do the big book think,” and it wasn’t until high school that she started writing poetry. From there, poetry became a hobby that she quickly realized she loved. Darah was able to expand on her passion by enrolling in collegiate-level creative writing courses and interning for several literary magazines, including with Yellow Arrow in 2021. Over the years, poetry has become a “safe space” for Darah; a place where she can explore her thoughts and ponder the state of the world. When not working, studying, or figuring out her next steps in life, Darah says that she enjoys filling the notes app in her iPhone with short lines or thoughts that she can later develop into complete poems.

Your collection revolves around natural imagery and a relationship with nature: have you always been attuned to nature and was there someone in your life who inspired this?

I’ve always been fascinated with nature. I can’t pinpoint when it started, but I’ve always incorporated natural imagery into my writing. College has also shaped me way more than I thought it would. [St. Mary’s College of Maryland] is a very nature-based campus. We have a pond and a riverside and in spring everything is in bloom. And going for a walk is the highlight of my day on this campus. So, it’s hard not to be inspired by nature here.

[Growing up, I lived in] Baltimore County, which is very crowded and is called a suburb but as close as you can get to the “city” without being a city. Which is why I also think I am so drawn to places like St. Mary’s and rural Pennsylvania because when I do visit those places it is such a stark contrast to where I grew up. There’s so much nature to see that I’m kind of awed by it, and it’s really nice to see places that haven’t been touched as much by humans.

When I was really young, I remember that it would be a big deal when my grandmother would take me to the state park nearby: Gunpowder State Park. We would go on a hike and sometimes go fishing . . . or we would swim in the river and play on the rocks. And my cousins and I would go rock climbing—very small-scale rock climbing, never anything big and those were treats for us! That was something that I looked forward to every summer, every spring. [Those trips] have stuck with me, and I find . . . being outside something special. And I definitely think my grandmother—my Mommom—has been a big influence on that because she adores nature. She loves going on her drives. She’ll go driving and one day, she texted me and said, “I’m out and I just saw 10 deer” and [the time] was 2:00 am! She’ll stay up all night just to see a deer—it’s a really special relationship she has, and I think she gave me a little bit of that.

The past few years, some of my friends and I have gotten more into herbalism and pagan traditions, and these small practices have helped me appreciate nature in ways I didn’t before.

I took a class on the literature of paganism and witchcraft where we also delved into herbal medicine. I even wrote my final paper on the significance of daffodils in herbalism. I think that [class] has influenced my relationship with nature as well and how healing it can be and how intimate people should be with [nature].

What would happen if I kept the windows down as I drove,

the gray air woven in my hair, the smell of a Pennsylvania winter

clinging heavy in my pores

“winter in Pennsylvania”

In your poem “herbal medicine,” you speak of nature as being able to heal. How have you used nature in your own life to heal?

I’m going to keep returning to it because I feel like it’s true: I think that sitting outside when it’s nice or [listening to rainstorms and thunder can be] healing. If I have the window cracked and I get to hear [the storm] then I can take a break from all the stress. And getting to sit outside and listen to the birds or look at the flowers . . . is healing. . . . I do that a lot [by myself] and I do that a lot with my friends. We sit on our patio and listen to a little music and enjoy the day. And I really hope that more people get to do that. We get so caught up in the stresses of everyday life that we don’t pay attention. And I know this is the stop-and-smell-the-roses [cliché], but it’s so true—if I didn’t take those 30 minutes a day to sit and relax, I don’t know what I would do.

In the last several years, especially among college students and recent college graduates, I’ve seen a resurgence of herbalism and a focus on nature as a belief system on social media. Why do you think that your generation is beginning to take inspiration from pagan ideals and herbal medicine?

I think it is a combination of things. On social media, it has become trendy to be into paganism, witchcraft, and herbal medicine. But I also think that—and this is speculation—a lot of people my age and younger that I know aren’t religious. But I think that for [other older generations] religion always seemed to be something that people found solace in, and it was comforting to believe in something. [Now,] people my age, myself included, don’t necessarily adhere to one [religion], so I think it’s comforting to believe in nature. And I know that sounds very hippie-dippie, but it feels very grounding to trust in nature, to enjoy nature, and to find comfort in it. And while it’s not necessarily an established religion, I think that a lot of people my age enjoy it for those reasons.

Here, let the drops of peppermint oil and patience drip-drip

from your palms like

VapoRub for the rattled soul

“herbal medicine”

In your poem “Eden,” you reference the often-unmentioned biblical figure of Lilith, what was your spiritual upbringing like and how did you learn of Lilith?

I don’t know when I first heard about Lilith. [The story of Lilith] was always kind of something that my mom and I thought was interesting. I grew up Episcopalian . . . and when I fell out of a strict Christian religion, I looked more into other [beliefs] and I brought it to my mom, and I was like “Hey . . . why haven’t we talked about Lilith?” And she was all on board to talk about it because she didn’t know that much about [her and her story] either. So, we looked into the story of the first woman, [Lilith,] who wasn’t made from Adam—and I’m not that familiar with it but based on the research that I have done [my understanding is that] because she didn’t want to obey [Adam] she was cast out [of Eden]. And then another woman, [Eve,] was made from Adam to serve Adam. And [after learning more about her] my question was: why was this myth created if no one wants to talk about it? And I was so fascinated by the story because it is everything that I talk about with my friends and in college and with my mom: women aren’t made to obey people. That’s something I’ve never believed in. My mother always told me that I am my own person. . . . And I think that the basis of the story is that an independent woman is demonized, and I want more women to know about [the story of] Lilith.

Lilith, do you think of Eve, when you run with your night creatures?

When you fly into the dark air, hated but free?

“Eden”

Young love and being in the eye of one’s lover are themes that repeat throughout your poems and is also a timeless theme in poetry. Why do you think that poetry has been a vessel for love for so long?

I think that love is poetic. I know that’s not a great answer, but [love] is something that no one is able to come up with a good definition for and I think that keeps us writing about it. Because, if [you ask someone] to describe love, every single person is going to give a different answer. And [their answers] might be related to each other, but everyone’s interpretation of love and how they love is unique. And I think that keeps [the theme of] love going in poems and in stories and songs because it is something that we can never officially pin down.

A lot of my poems are about my relationship with my partner and some of them are fictionalized because I’ve been with my partner for a very long time, and we are very committed to one another. But I also identify as a bisexual woman and I’m in a straight passing relationship. . . . I think there are a lot of ways to love and types of love, and I fictionalize it because I am so obsessed with it. Love is something that I have experienced, and I am experiencing, but there are different types of love that I may never experience, but I am able to explore those types through my writing.

What do you hope your readers gain from reading when the daffodils die or how do you think the poems will sit with your readers?

I hope that they enjoy them, but I also hope that someone, somewhere relates to something I’ve written. It doesn’t have to be that everybody likes it or hates it; I want someone to walk away from it [thinking] I enjoyed myself while I was reading and maybe thought of something in a way that I hadn’t before. Maybe, “I’m gonna look at nature differently,” or maybe, “I saw myself in one of the relationship poems and it made me happy.” I want people to open it and relate [to the poems] in some way.

On cloudy days I’d lay at the very edge of the bed on my back

[. . .]

and wait to see if I could feel the

world stop turning

if I held my breath. it was a good use of the day when the sky was full

to watch the trees sway

and think about abortion rights

or privilege

or poverty

“cloudy days”

You first worked with Yellow Arrow as a 2021 summer intern, helping with publications and writing several blogs, even now. How did you originally find out about Yellow Arrow?

I actually reached out to Yellow Arrow because I was looking up places [near my home in Maryland] that I could intern for . . . I saw Yellow Arrow while I was researching, and they were my top choice because I loved the message. I loved that it’s women-owned, women-run, women supporting women, and it’s not just that, there’s also diversity. It’s not just white women who are having their voices heard and who are getting the chance to be published and talk about how awesome writing is, but all types of women.

From whom or what do you seek inspiration?

Everywhere. All the time. I write very much in the present, so I tend to write about whatever I’m seeing or feeling or reading about in the moment. That’s why I love the notes app on my phone. I’ll be walking back from work, and I’ll see an especially big tuft of onion grass . . . and I just write down a quick note about onion grass, and then it shows up [in a poem] later on. [My writing is] very in the moment and it is usually just snippets of something and later I’ll make it into a broader poem.

I fall in love daily

with the sky and the sea and

the pollen watering my eyes

“marriage”

Do you have a favorite poet?

I had a big Sylvia Plath tapestry for a long time, so definitely Sylvia. I’ve gotten very into Bell Hooks recently, and I was kind of devastated when she passed [a short time ago]. I actually wrote a poem about Bell Hooks’ passing. And over quarantine, I got very into Sappho. So I ordered myself a big collection of Sappho poetry in order to pass the time.

Daffodil imagery is a large presence throughout your chapbook: it’s the name of the book as well as your final piece. Why did you end your collection with the eponymous poem, “the daffodils die”?

As soon as I wrote the short daffodil poem, when I was putting together the collection, I was like this has to be the last one. And I think it’s because I thought daffodils symbolize death, but they also symbolize rebirth and the beginning of spring. But I think that when things end, other things begin so it is very much a cycle; just as the book is ending, the daffodils die, but there is still a continuation.

I have to ask—even though I think I know the answer—what is your favorite flower?

Definitely daffodils. I know—very on the nose. We have the gulch here [at St Mary’s College in Maryland], which is what the last poem is written about, and every March the entire [hillside] blooms and everything is yellow and green and it’s beautiful. [There’s a path on the hillside] that winds down to a hidden beach and it’s just my favorite place to go in March. I just like the idea of daffodils—they don’t even get to see spring, but they announce spring is here.

****

Since this interview, Darah graduated from St. Mary’s College of Maryland with a BA in English and a minor in creative writing. This summer she will work part-time before starting her MS in professional writing at Towson University in the fall. Please show your support of Darah by preordering your copy of when the daffodils die today.

Thank you, Darah and Siobhan, for sharing your conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. Yellow Arrow recently revamped and restructured its Yellow Arrow Journal subscription plan to include two levels. Do you think you are an Avid Reader or a Literary Lover? Find out more about the discounts and goodies involved at yellowarrowpublishing.com/store/yellow-arrow-journal-subscription.

You can support us as we AWAKEN in a variety of ways: purchase one of our publications from the Yellow Arrow bookstore, join our newsletter, follow us on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or subscribe to our YouTube channel. Donations are appreciated via PayPal (staff@yellowarrowpublishing.com), Venmo (@yellowarrowpublishing), or US mail (PO Box 102, Glen Arm, MD 21057). More than anything, messages of support through any one of our channels are greatly appreciated.

Kapua Iao 4/12/22 Kapua Iao 4/12/22

From Kathmandu to Baltimore: The most beautiful garden by Nikita Rimal Sharma

Yellow Arrow Publishing announces the release of our latest chapbook, The most beautiful garden, by Nikita Rimal Sharma. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to advocate for all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal as well as single-author publications, and by providing strong author support, writing workshops, and volunteering opportunities. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Nikita in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

The most beautiful garden is an expression of Nikita. It is a collection of poems that includes themes such as mental health, South Asian culture, her mother, and family. It reflects on deep heartaches, dark moments and light moments, pride, joy, and love, with the hope that anyone who reads The most beautiful garden also gets a chance to reflect on the beautiful being they are in spite of the baggage and everything they hold.

The incredible cover art was created by Creative Director Alexa Laharty based on a photograph Nikita provided of her mother. Interior images were also drawn by Alexa.

Nikita currently resides in Baltimore, Maryland with her husband and Pitbull Terrier, Stone, and works at B’More Clubhouse, a community-based mental health nonprofit. She is originally from Kathmandu, Nepal. Nikita is a typical homebody who gets a lot of joy from slow running, short hikes, reading, and deep thoughts. She has always loved writing and started writing at the age of seven when she wrote a fairy tale titled “Star Girls.” Nikita wishes she had saved a copy of it.

Paperback and PDF versions of The most beautiful garden are now available from the Yellow Arrow bookstore. If interested in purchasing more than one paperback copy for friends and family, check out our discounted wholesale prices here. You can also search for The most beautiful garden wherever you purchase your books including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Kobo. To learn more about Nikita and The most beautiful garden, check out our recent interview with her.

You can find Nikita on Instagram @nikita.playwithwords, and connect with Yellow Arrow on Facebook and Instagram, to share some love for this chapbook. We’ll let everyone know about her book launch soon.

Happy National Poetry Month!

*****

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 3/15/22 Kapua Iao 3/15/22

Believing in the Power of Love Too Much: A Conversation with Nikita Rimal Sharma

A mere matchstick

I thought myself to be,

feeble in structure.

Needing several strikes for a single second of flame.

(not) just a matchstick

“I believe in the power of love too much,” says Nikita Rimal Sharma, the author of Yellow Arrow Publishing’s next chapbook, The most beautiful garden. This stunning sentiment about the inspiration behind her latest work summarizes the message of her chapbook beautifully: the world is not perfect and yet, we must keep loving it. Nikita’s unconditional love for our world in spite of all the tragedy, frustration, and nonsense is the underlying thread that runs through her collection. Throughout The most beautiful garden, which we cannot wait for you to read, Nikita’s poems touch on the struggles of depression, immigration, and identity and yet are grounded in the understanding that even during bouts of despair there is still hope to be found. Nikita emphasizes that “believing in the power of love too much” allows us to be aware of the brutal realities of the world while still unearthing strength and beauty in ourselves, others, and nature.

And that beautiful sentiment is definitely something visible in the incredible cover of The most beautiful garden, drawn by Yellow Arrow Creative Director Alexa Laharty. After seeing the cover, Nikita exclaimed, “Alexa put my imagination into a lovely form of art for the cover page. It summarizes the title poem perfectly and also the way I would like to approach life: making the best out of what you have, noticing beauty and the vividness of colors in yourself and the things around you. Thank you so much, Alexa, for all that you and the Yellow Arrow team have done for me during this process.”

The most beautiful garden is now available for PRERELEASE (click here for wholesale prices) and will be released April 12, 2022. Follow Yellow Arrow on Facebook and Instagram for Friday sneak peeks into The most beautiful garden, starting this Friday and continuing through April 8. Recently, Editorial Associate Siobhan McKenna took some time to get to know Nikita and the inspiration behind The most beautiful garden.

Kathmandu is the root to my being

[. . .]

Wichita was the blank canvas for the rest of my life

[. . .]

Baltimore is the city that helped me fly

The places that made me

Originally born and raised in Kathmandu, Nepal, Nikita moved with her husband to Wichita, Kansas at the age of 25. There, she completed her master’s degree and eventually moved to Baltimore, Maryland, her current home. In Baltimore, she stumbled upon Yellow Arrow House while walking through the Highlandtown neighborhood; she decided to go inside. “It was almost like serendipity. I got a business card and looked on the website and saw that there was an upcoming class.” The class was “A Year in Poetry” with Ann Quinn and many of the poems that she started in that class are part of her forthcoming collection.

Although “A Year in Poetry” class honed her poetry skills, Nikita has always loved writing as a method to process her emotions. Throughout her life, she has written journal entries, poems, and letters to herself as a way of honoring the ending of one chapter and the beginning of another. In many ways, Nikita’s The most beautiful garden is a work of reflection and synthesis as she braids together her Nepali roots with the life and identity that she has established and continues to create in the United States.

Throughout The most beautiful garden, it sounds like not all Nepali culture resonated with you. How did you navigate this? Are there any Nepali customs that you hold onto?

I had a happy childhood. Here [in the U.S.], I am [a brown minority], but there [in Nepal] I had the privileges of a white person: so [many] good opportunities, but with that came a lot of pressure. But for me, [the pressure] didn’t really benefit me, because every action that I did was judged very badly. I was [in a generation with] access to technology and some things I did were modern, but some members of my extended family were really traditional. So, no matter what I did I was always judged and as a patriarchal society, it was all very toxic for me.

Here, I feel like I live for myself now, but when in Nepal, you live for others. “What are people gonna say?” is at the forefront of every decision-making, and I don’t do well with that. I also saw how my mom as a daughter-in-law or just as a woman was treated because she was from one generation above me and she had less opportunities than me. And all of that really bothered me and never fostered my growth and those are the pains that [I still hold in my heart]. But now that I’m here, I’m able to work through that and create a life that feels more like myself. And that does not mean I am going to give up everything. Obviously, there are cultural things, [family] and friends I will never be able to let go of.

Overall, being from a different culture lends me a different eye when solving problems or in viewing the world. Also, just the food that I eat. I’ve come to realize how the food that I grew up eating was actually a really healthy diet—and I hated that food as a child. It was lentils, rice— the daal bhaat is what we call it, and every meal was that. Now, I can’t wait to have it. So, any time I can have homemade food like that, I feel like I’m home again. And there are so many smaller and bigger things that I take [from my culture] and I treasure them.

You talk about how your culture growing up wasn’t as beneficial for who you are as a person. Can you talk more about the expectations of South Asian women?

[Those sentiments] are specific to my mom’s or mother-in-law’s generation. They have never been taught to know themselves or to explore themselves, and I feel very lucky to be able to do that. If you ask anyone from my mom’s generation: what do you like or what are things you enjoy doing? They don’t usually have an answer. Instead, they will say: “Oh, whatever you like” or “The happiness of others.” And of course, service and making others happy is very essential. But I feel that [they] have been taught to only find purpose in the well-being of others so that they forget to think about themselves and about what is good for them, and you just reach a point in your life where all of that keeps getting piled up and it was never sorted out or healed or worked through and I feel like that continues the vicious cycle of intergenerational trauma.

Obviously, the U.S. has its own problems in regard to the ways we treat women, but do you see similar parallels between your experience in Nepal and the United States?

Kind of, in different ways. I do think that with a lot of things [in the U.S.] we are way ahead although I don’t think [our journey for equality] will ever end. But in Nepal, there are some very basic constructs for women. [For example] when I was on my period, I wasn’t able to go in the kitchen. Of course, those things changed as I grew older and times changed, but those are things that you don’t have to think about in the United States.

In a later email, Nikita added, “There are communities in Nepal that still follow the practice of isolation during a woman’s period and some women have even lost their life due to negligence during the isolation.

Have you found yourself at peace in your merging of Nepalese and U.S. cultures?

Well, I have merged into a lot of things, but I think there are parts of me that will never fully merge no matter how much I try and that’s OK and that’s the beauty of it. Like I said, food is a big example or when talking about pop culture there are so many things! You can mention a song and I’ve never heard of it and that is a barrier. So, there are gentle reminders in my everyday life that make it harder for me to merge fully. At the same time, in recent years, I have been able to understand both cultures to be able to take some of my learnings from this culture and be able to communicate that with my mom and help her navigate her own life [in Nepal].

It is up to us,

to remain a sapling,

give ourselves the permission

to dig deeper

Growth

How has poetry helped your mental health?

A lot. I think writing this whole chapbook has helped with my mental health. I [wrote The most beautiful garden] during the pandemic and that’s when time was slower, and I was also going through a lot of emotional changes. There were things happening in my personal life, and I had a lot of very strong emotions, and I was trying to work on all of that. And writing [about my emotions] and sharing it was hard, but it also helped me sort through feelings. I also sought help from a psychiatrist and therapist, and that helped, but poetry was definitely one of the tools that I used for healing.

Why do we—mainly people who identify as women—still allow ourselves to be shamed by numbers and images even when understanding all the good our bodies do?

I wish I knew the answer because this is an ongoing struggle. In my 30s, I’ve been the strongest that I’ve ever been. I work out more consistently. I run. I eat better. I eat whatever I want. I’ve never been diagnosed with an eating disorder, but there was a point in my life when I was very restrictive with my diet. Now, I eat whatever I want, but that came from a reflection of how all the women I’ve talked to or anyone who identifies as a woman have at least one body part that they are insecure about. It does not matter how much you weigh or your body shape.

I think that . . . I don’t know the answer.

We have made progress as a society to accept our bodies as they are, but I still find it very hard to think of myself that way and I’m sure I’ll learn, and I’ll reframe. But even at this point no matter how much progress I make, I’ll always struggle with body image. If you find the answer, let me know.

Try to love people when it’s hard for you to love:

[ . . . ]

Let the wings of your heart fly to places it doesn’t want to go.

Maybe, this is how we can make the world a better place?

You write about loving people even when they are dissimilar to yourself. This sentiment seems especially relevant right now. How do you see that in action in our society today?

I think a lot about this. Right now, politically the world seems so polariz[ed]. No matter what: my opinion is right, no matter what side you’re on. And it does matter [to an extent] in politics and law and decision-making, but we make it matter more than it should sometimes. And our whole media and the entire world and social media are geared toward making us see all the differences, but then we don’t give enough time and attention to see the things that we have in common.

I believe in the power of love too much. Differences exist. And I don’t like certain opinions, I feel like they’re wrong, but they are opinions in the end. They are not your identity, and they are not the struggles that humans go through. So, it’s important to have opinions based on fact and science, but if we are not willing to find a common ground and to approach things with love and understanding—approach other humans who are different and try to think from their perspective—then I feel like no matter how much progress we make it still won’t be complete or whole for me.

Later, Nikita added, “Opinions do matter especially in a country like the United States where we have people from all over the world and varied cultures.”

You also mention using your voice to spread peace through nonviolence. How do you envision change being made through nonviolent communication?

I think nonviolent communication leads to more understanding. It helps us slow down and think and reflect a bit more. So that the change may be slower, but more sustainable. But I do hope with my language I want to get more involved with mental health advocacy and write more in those areas in a way that is more understanding and relatable.

I also want to use my writing as a way to find more things in common with people rather than attacking [them]. I don’t appreciate on social media when humans say, “Hey, what you’re doing is wrong.” And in coming from [a nonviolent] place, I think we’d bring about more change.

Finally, you mentioned that you’ve fallen in love with Baltimore. At Yellow Arrow, the city of Baltimore is very close to our hearts, but for most people outside of Baltimore, it’s a very underrated city. What has kept you in Baltimore?

I think people are very authentic here and that’s what has kept me in Baltimore. Everyone I have interacted with [seems to “keep it real”]. I have an example. I live in South Baltimore now, but I used to live downtown and the UPS guy in our apartment was the best human that I’ve ever met. Whenever he came in with a package, he always had the most genuine smile. It wasn’t just a customer service smile. It was a hey, I’m-here-I’m-happy smile. In December 2016, I was going through a pretty bad bout of depression, and I think seeing him would always make my day and he has no idea the difference that he made in my life. But just things like that when you’re walking around the city: people do greet you and not in an I-have-to-be-friendly kind of way. They really mean it. When people help here, it comes from the heart, and I think that’s what has me glued to the city—I really love that. For the size of the city, it really is community-oriented.

*****

Thank you, Nikita and Siobhan, for sharing your conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 2/8/22 Kapua Iao 2/8/22

Poetry is Life: How it Happened

So far, 2022 has been a jam-packed year for Yellow Arrow Publishing. We have chosen to AWAKEN in 2022, to reopen, reintroduce, reactivate, and restructure many of our core programs, including our Writers-in-Residence program (application open February 7–25), workshops (first class at the end of February!), and publications. Ann Quinn, Yellow Arrow Journal’s poetry editor and our only workshop instructor in 2020, has played a major role throughout the first month of 2022.

Her workshop “Poetry is Life” will begin again in March and as you all know, we just released the fantastic Poetry is Life: Writing with Yellow Arrow, a guidebook for both readers and writers of poetry, alike.

Find your copy of Poetry is Life in the Yellow Arrow bookstore and reserve your spot in her class today. The live reading of Poetry is Life was on February 6 and is now available on the Yellow Arrow YouTube channel: youtu.be/cg7x3c_uVwo.

So, how did it all happen?

By Ann Quinn

Our first meeting was in person. March 7, 2020, was to be the first of 12-monthly sessions—a year of poetry—in Yellow Arrow’s new house, decorated by volunteers with donated furniture and fixtures and lots of yellow paint. It still smelled a bit mildewy, but it was ours. Eight strangers gathered, with that slight prickle of mistrust—what will she ask of me, what will they think of me—but before long we were reading a poem together and parsing it and starting to break down the walls, just a little bit. Two hours later, we had shared, we had seen one another in our writing, we had eaten donuts from Hoehn’s Bakery, and we promised to come back in April.

And you know what happened next. But this class had been a dream of mine, and I was not about to let it go because of a pandemic. I called Gwen Van Velsor, Yellow Arrow’s founder, and said that I wanted to continue on Zoom. She agreed, somewhat doubtfully, I think, as long as I provided the account.

This was the class I had wanted to take, for decades. When I was 26, my mom gifted me a poetry weekend with Sandy Lyon, a poet who hosted weekend workshops in his home in Bethesda, Maryland. At that point, I had done some journaling, and I had written the occasional sonnet, but I was not alert to the magic latent in words arranged carefully and sparely on the page. And then the weekend was over, and I didn’t know how to carry this coolness on all by myself. So I returned to the rest of my messy life and was just a bit more inclined to read poems when they showed up and to wonder how the writer did that. And to take every opportunity, rare as it was, to write with others. And to return over and over to the question that Mary Oliver asks, “What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

Twenty years later—after graduate school in music, a year in an ashram, a brief stint in acupuncture school, lots of freelance work, marriage, and two kids—I interviewed a neighbor, Michael Collier, former Poet Laureate of Maryland, in order to write an article about him. In preparation for our meeting, I read one of his books. I read the poems one at a time, in waiting rooms, at the playground, in the minutes between my kids’ bedtime and mine. And the poems circled in my head and made me think and wonder and see things in new ways. And after the interview, Michael gave me a book that included an essay on how he decided to become a poet. You could decide to become a poet? Your poems could be bad at first, and then gradually improve? It seems so obvious now, but at the time it felt revelatory. I began reading voraciously and getting up early to try to write. I longed to take a class, but the nearest class was an hour’s drive, if I was lucky, down 95, 495, and Connecticut Avenue, and I couldn’t count on getting back by the end of my kids’ school day. My passion slowed to a simmer. My family came first.

Then my mom died. If you’ve experienced grief, you know how life-changing it can be. And if you’re reading this, you probably know how healing poetry can be as an outlet. Now poetry felt crucial. And my kids were older. I found a way to get to Bethesda one day a week for a Poetry 101 class with Nan Fry. I got into an advanced poetry class at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County, with the marvelous Lia Purpura. I’ll never forget the feeling of walking into the undergraduate classroom at 50. How keenly I felt my age, and yet at the same time I felt 12. But how my heart sang. That semester, and the following (in which I took Intermediate Poetry with Lia—and I would happily take Beginning Poetry with her, too), were days in which I carried a light in my chest—it was like a low-grade, long-lasting feeling of being in love. And still, I would cry at the slightest remembering that my mother was gone. Meanwhile, the poetry poured forth.

Lia told me about a low-residency MFA program in Tacoma, Washington. I got in. Three years later, I graduated. I had some publishing success, including a book, Final Deployment (2018) from Finishing Line Press. But I was keenly interested in teaching, and I was looking for opportunities. I volunteered to lead a writing group at my church; before long, the free class had sorted itself into a small but dedicated group of writers who were willing to be vulnerable and real, confirming that yes, this was what I wanted to do.

Doors don’t always open at first. Poetry, like any of the arts, has a certain self-imposed hierarchy, where sometimes it feels as if obscurity wins the prizes. This is a shame because poetry has so much to offer everyone. And coming out of an MFA program, many people wonder which path to take. I think everyone has an important story, and what my study has given me is a way to gently lead those who would write poetry down the path of craft, for that is where delight lies.

Gwen created Yellow Arrow to open more doors to writers who might not otherwise be heard. Teaching here, and helping edit the journal, I feel like I’m helping these voices find their way. This class has been a gift. From the very first session on Zoom, we’ve had students from the West Coast, the Midwest, the South, and even Canada. A cohesive group has formed, and while we welcome others into the class, there are eight regulars who have attended almost since the beginning (three of whom were there on the donut day). We felt it was time to show you what we’ve done so far, which is how Poetry is Life: Writing with Yellow Arrow happened. “Poetry is Life” is the class I wanted to take, all those years ago. And Poetry is Life is a way to share it with you.

You can find a copy of Poetry is Life in the Yellow Arrow bookstore and through most online distributors. Poetry is Life was compiled by Ann and includes contributions by Linda Gail Francis, Patrick W. Gibson, Jessica Gregg, Sara Palmer, Julia W. Prentice, Patti Ross, Nikita Rimal Sharma, and Jobie Townshend-Zellner. Cover art, “Coastal Vibrancy,” is by Claudia Cameron and the cover design is by Alexa Laharty.

Ann Quinn is a poet, editor, teacher, mentor, mother, and classical clarinetist. Her award-winning work has been published in Poet Lore, Potomac Review, Little Patuxent Review, Broadkill Review, The Ekphrastic Review, Haibun Today, and Snapdragon, and is included in the anthology Red Sky: Poetry on the Global Epidemic of Violence Against Women. Her chapbook, Final Deployment, is published by Finishing Line Press. She teaches at the Writer’s Center in Bethesda and for Yellow Arrow Publishing and is the poetry editor for Yellow Arrow Journal. Ann holds an MFA in poetry from Pacific Lutheran University and lives in Catonsville, Maryland with her family. Visit her at annquinn.net.

*****

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 2/1/22 Kapua Iao 2/1/22

Poetry is Life: A Workshop Becomes a Book

Yellow Arrow announces the release of an unexpected but delightful poetry guide, Poetry is Life: Writing with Yellow Arrow. The book, which grew from a monthly writing workshop launched in early 2020, is both a celebration of poetry created during the pandemic and a step-by-step practicum for those who wish to create their own verse.

In 12 chapters corresponding to 12 workshop sessions, readers will experience the class themselves through poems that participants created in response to work by beloved poets from William Blake to Terrence Hayes, from Elizabeth Bishop to Tracy K. Smith. Readers then can use the provided prompts to create their own poems. The book’s intent is to reacquaint readers with contemporary masters, introduce up-and-coming poets, and provide an interactive and structured approach that can be applied to their own practice.

The book was compiled by poet Ann Quinn, who also led the class. Ann was the first-place winner in the 2015 Bethesda Literary Arts Festival poetry contest and has been nominated for two Pushcart Prizes. Her chapbook, Final Deployment, was published by Finishing Line Press in 2018. She is Yellow Arrow’s poetry editor.

Eight poets, ranging from beginners to those with published books of poetry, participated in the monthly poetry workshop and contributed to the book. While the majority are from the Baltimore area, others hail from San Diego, Charlotte, and Detroit.

The cover is an acrylic painting with mixed media created by Baltimore artist Claudia Cameron.

Paperback and PDF versions of Poetry is Life are now available from the Yellow Arrow bookstore. If interested in purchasing more than one paperback copy for friends and family, check out our discounted wholesale prices here. You can also search for Poetry is Life wherever you purchase your books including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Kobo.

And don’t forget to join us for a reading of Poetry is Life on February 6 at 3:00 pm. Find out more here.

******

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. If interested in writing a review of Poetry is Life or any of our other publications, please email editor@yellowarrowpublishing.com for more information.

Kapua Iao 11/2/21 Kapua Iao 11/2/21

Meet the Yellow Arrow Publishing 2022 chapbook authors

By Kapua Iao

In 2020, Yellow Arrow Publishing released its first two chapbooks: Smoke the Peace Pipe (Roz Weaver) and the samurai (Linda M. Crate). Learning how to navigate the world of single-author publications and getting to know the authors was truly rewarding, and we decided to publish three more in 2021:

No Batteries Required (Ellen Dooling Reynard)
St. Paul Street Provocations (Patti Ross)
Listen (Ute Carson)

Moreover, we knew early in 2021 that we wanted to publish chapbook authors in 2022 and opened up submissions during the summer. We then formed a committee to blindly read through our final 45 submissions. Every chapbook received was heart-filled and personal. And because we consider everyone that publishes with Yellow Arrow family, we spent much time really thinking about our decision.

From these initial submissions, we created a shortlist of 15 chapbooks, eventually selecting three to publish in 2022. It was rewarding and difficult to email every submitter letting them know our decision but the process is now done, and we are so excited to work with the three chosen.

So without further ado, let’s meet the 2022 Yellow Arrow chapbook authors!

Sharma, Nikita Rimal.jpg — **Nikita Rimal Sharma**

*The most beautiful garden*

coming April 2022

Nikita Rimal Sharma currently resides in Baltimore, Maryland with her husband and dog, Stone, and works at B’More Clubhouse, a community-based mental health nonprofit. She is originally from Kathmandu, Nepal. Nikita is a typical homebody who gets a lot of joy from slow running, short hikes, reading, and deep thoughts. She has always loved writing and started writing at the age of seven when she wrote a fairy tale titled “Star Girls.” Nikita wishes she had saved a copy of it.

Her journey with poetry started when she took the first class organized by Yellow Arrow taught by the lovely Ann Quinn. It’s such a beautiful way of playing with words while processing your emotions. Nikita’s first published poem was in Yellow Arrow Journal (Re)Formation from fall 2020.

The most beautiful garden covers themes such as family, her mother, mental health, South Asian culture, and immigration. These are the different aspects her life is made up of and it was her little attempt to put everything into words.

Schillinger, Darah.jpeg — **Darah Schillinger**

*when the daffodils die*

coming July 2022

Darah Schillinger is a rising senior at St. Mary’s College of Maryland studying English Literature with a double minor in Creative Writing and Philosophy. She previously interned for the literary magazine EcoTheo Review in summer 2020 and has had poetry published in both her school literary journal, AVATAR, and in the Spillwords Press Haunted Holidays series for 2020. She was the publications intern for Yellow Arrow for summer 2021. Darah currently lives in Perry Hall, Maryland with her parents, and in her free time, she likes to write poetry and paint. After graduation, she plans to pursue an MA in Creative Writing and hopes to establish a career in publishing after its completion.

Her chapbook, when the daffodils die, is an assortment of love, loss, and wonder at the world that created us, compiled into a collection of 32 poems. Each poem has natural imagery, but the story line itself is about finding steadiness in our love of nature even if romantic love (the love we spend so much energy on) falls short. There are also feminist themes and body positivity incorporated throughout because Darah felt they best represent her and what she wishes to contribute with her work.

**Amanda Baker**

*What is Another Word for Intimacy?*

coming October 2022

Amanda Baker believes that we are more authentic as our childlike selves than we are as adults. We are more likely to share our truth and live our truth as children, but who says we have to stop. Amanda is a mental health therapist, 200-hour yoga instructor, and poet from Baltimore, Maryland. She attended the University of Maryland School of Social Work and James Madison University. She is a mother of her four-year-old son, Dylan, and enjoys time in nature. Amanda has self-published a poetry collection that includes written work from her early teens into her 30s. You may find her book ASK: A Collection of Poetry, Lyrics, and Words on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

She believes we all have the capacity to find our true selves by connecting back to our passions as children. Hers was and still is art, imagination, dance, and poetry. Amanda stopped writing around 18 and did not return until about two years ago, at age 31. We all have a story to share, and What is Another Word for Intimacy? is the heart and soul of a snapshot of her story.

Amanda started writing again. She wrote to fill the void. She wrote to create connections. She wrote to find intimacy.

Her writing has allowed her to escape detachment. Dissociation. Numbness. Amanda’s writing opened her eyes to imagination and an ability to form new relationships. She experienced existentialism. Confusion. Loss. Excitement. Lust. Love. Heartbreak. True vitality in moving from fear to vulnerability, to intimacy. What is Another Word for Intimacy? takes readers through emotions, connections, and memories, which resembles true fluctuations of intimacy in words and present mindfulness.

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. We are so proud of everyone we publish at Yellow Arrow. You can learn more about all our authors here and support them by purchasing publications in the Yellow Arrow bookstore.

Thank you again to everyone who submitted and to everyone who supports these women and all writers who toil away day after day. Please show these three some love in the comments below or on Yellow Arrow’s Facebook or Instagram.

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. To learn more about publishing, volunteering, or donating, visit yellowarrowpublishing.com.

Kapua Iao 10/12/21 Kapua Iao 10/12/21

Listen by Ute Carson: Exchanging Stories

Carson Listen cover_back, spine, front.jpg

Yellow Arrow Publishing announces the release of our latest chapbook, Listen, by Ute Carson. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to advocate for all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal as well as single-author publications, and by providing strong author support, writing workshops, and volunteering opportunities. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Ute in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

Listen spans the life cycle: birth, parenting (and grandparenting), aging, and dying. Images of nature and our connections to it abound throughout because nature is our habitat. The cover further invokes this symbiotic relationship. The poems within Listen run a full gamut of human emotions—wonder, doubt, pleasure, regret, love, loss, enchantment, and more, all woven into the fabric of lived experience and of experience imagined.

Ute Carson, a German-born writer from youth and an MA graduate in comparative literature from the University of Rochester, published her first prose piece in 1977. Ute has since published two novels, a novella, a volume of stories, four collections of poetry, and numerous essays here and abroad. Her poetry was twice nominated for the Pushcart Award.

Paperback and PDF versions of Listen are now available from the Yellow Arrow Bookstore. If interested in purchasing more than one paperback copy for friends and family, check out our discounted wholesale prices here. You can also search for Listen wherever you purchase your books including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Kobo. To learn more about Ute and Listen, check out our recent interview with her.

You can find Ute at utecarson.com or on Facebook, and connect with Yellow Arrow on Facebook and Instagram, to share some love for this chapbook.

***

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. To learn about publishing, volunteering, or donating, visit yellowarrowpublishing.com. If interested in writing a review of Listen or any of our other publications, please email editor@yellowarrowpublishing.com for more information.

Kapua Iao 9/28/21 Kapua Iao 9/28/21

Celebrating EMERGE: Coming Into View and Pandemic Stories

By Brenna Ebner

For this year’s Yellow Arrow Publishing value, board/staff picked EMERGE. It was a decision made to celebrate a new year after we all faced such uncertainty and turmoil throughout all of 2020. We felt the start of 2021 was especially important in this way and were grateful to be able to turn over a new leaf and welcome new times filled with opportunity and optimism. As we have progressed through the year, we have progressed as individuals and as a community. EMERGE spotlights the growth and change we have made be it from this past year or before.

With this yearly value, we chose to call upon Yellow Arrow staff and authors to spotlight their growth and change in our EMERGE zines. EMERGE: Pandemic Stories focuses on the ways in which our staff and authors have dealt with the uncertainty and fear from Covid-19 and the ways they have prospered from overcoming this daunting global challenge. Their experiences are ones many of us can relate to and ones that can open our eyes to the ways Covid-19 has impacted each of us differently as well. EMERGE: Coming Into View similarly focuses on change and growth many of us have had in facing the pandemic and racial unrest while also focusing on themes outside of this year. The stories included take place at many different times and touch on family, self-empowerment, and racial identity as well.

Both zines are now available through Yellow Arrow’s bookstore as a PDF (for a donation). And on our YouTube channel, we just released prerecorded videos of several EMERGE authors reading their incredible pieces. Please show your love and support for our authors.

To celebrate the release of both EMERGE zines, we are sharing Aressa V. Williams’ piece “Good Company” from EMERGE: Pandemic Stories. Aressa shares her experience in turning her time in quarantine into something productive and rejuvenating for herself. She delves into her passion of creative writing as a tool to help in her self-reflection and a way to find solace within herself. Her newfound practices of mindfulness, boundaries, and healing speak to the ways in which we are able to transform even when stuck at home. Aressa’s transformation during quarantine is inspiring and uplifting as it gives hope to each of us to be able to do the same kind of EMERGING even in the face of great setbacks and loss. EMERGE celebrates not only these recent transformations but many others as well. With our zines, we hope to encourage each of us to continue growing, changing, and EMERGING.

“Good Company” by Aressa V. Williams

Solitude during the pandemic gave me time for self-examination, a soul check. Like so many, I took freedom for granted. Before Covid, my retirement days were busy. Tutoring, shoe shopping, dining with friends, attending matinees, coming and going as I pleased. But since I love my peaceful, safe abode, I did not mind the national time-out at home. I created a rhythm and flow to make the best of my seclusion. In fact, the quarantine was an unexpected chance for reflection, meditation, and creative writing.

I thought about foolish mistakes made in the past. Dropping by coworkers’ homes without calling or being invited. Complaining to my supervisor’s boss without first talking to my supervisor. Hurting a close friend’s feelings. “What? Pregnant again!” Too many unfiltered comments, missteps, wrongdoing. Why didn’t I know better? I imagined going back in time to apologize to the victims of my venom. Scene by scene, I revisited people who were disrespected, offended. One by one, I asked for forgiveness. Visualizing warm hugs in sunlight, I hoped they felt my sincerity.

Daily meditations were a priority for frontline workers, our political leaders, Covid patients, and me. In addition to prayers, I experimented with “distant healing,”—sending energy and well-wishing to those in need far away. I managed to keep my gratitude journal up to date while evening news reported pandemic deaths, racial injustice, and political discord. When bad news and pessimistic friends overwhelmed me, I fasted from negativity. I did not answer the phone, nor check text or email messages, nor listen to the news. Instead, I read inspirational articles, listened to love songs, watched black-and-white movies, walked wearing my mask, and engaged in positive self-talk. The personal time-outs were rejuvenating.

And home was my writing retreat. I took advantage of several creative writing opportunities and several heartaches. Between drafting, revising, and editing four poems and one essay, I lost eight people. Three family members and a close friend died of fatal diseases; four classmates died of Covid. I was forced to reconsider thoughts about death. Old sayings like “we are only visitors here” and “tomorrow is not promised to you” did not comfort me. Consequently, journal writing became my grief therapy. Composing poems, obituaries, and letters to honor the lives of loved ones eased sadness. Family and friends (and I) were grateful.

All in all, my creative retreat proved fruitful as all writing submissions were published. More importantly, months of reflection, meditation, and journaling introduced me to a new role. A recluse with a purpose. Aloneness is good company.

Brenna Ebner is Yellow Arrow’s CNF Managing Editor. She previously interned with Mason Jar Press and was Editor-in-Chief of Grub Street volume 69 at Towson University. She also does freelance editing on the side and is slowly making her way through a CNF reading list.

Aressa V. Williams, a retired Washington, D.C. public school teacher and a retired assistant professor of English at Anne Arundel Community College, is also a teacher consultant, creative writing presenter, and poet. She is an active member of Pen in Hand, Poetry X Hunger, and Poetry Nation. Equally important, she accepted the new role as a Literary Leader for the Prince Georges County Arts and Humanities Council. In the sixth grade, the aspiring message-maker wrote her first book of poems to earn a Girl Scout badge for Creative Writing. Today, Aressa has three self-published books, Soft Shadows, The Penny Finder, and most recent Pancakes & Chocolate Milk. Her inspiring poems strike universal notes about family, friends, resilience, and hope. Aressa believes that poems are word snapshots of our experiences. Moreover, she defines poetry as word music. The word-weaver enjoys walking at School House Pond, journaling, and interpreting dreams. Other interests are reading short stories, posing poll questions, and sky-watching. A good day for Aressa includes morning meditation, afternoon tea, and if possible, a nap. The poetess is the proud mother of Aaron Coley and grateful grandmother of Aressa Coley.

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 9/21/21 Kapua Iao 9/21/21

Announcing EMERGE: Coming Into View and Pandemic Views

By Brenna Ebner

Both zines will be available through Yellow Arrow’s bookstore as a PDF (for a donation) on September 28. And on the same day on our YouTube channel, we will release videos of several EMERGE authors reading their incredible pieces. Please show your love and support for our authors. More information can be found on our events calendar.

As a sneak peek, we would like to share Nichola Ruddell’s piece “Emerge” from EMERGE: Coming Into View not only for the fitting title but because it perfectly encapsulates everything we have felt as a whole going through the uncertainty of the pandemic and in finding the courage to push on. Nichola emphasizes the importance of poetry as a way to cope, understand, and process the hardships we have faced during 2020 and the fear of what is to come next in 2021. But with the powerful tool of writing and a newfound sense of bravery, Nichola inspires us to follow in her lead and focus on the strengths we have gained through this experience and from our passions. EMERGE celebrates not only these recent transformations but many others as well. With our zines, we hope to encourage continued growth, change, and EMERGING.

“Emerge” by Nichola Ruddell

As I emerge from this year, I feel a certain hesitancy to move forward. The transition back to a life we once knew after a year punctuated by fear and loneliness, a year of panic and anxiety will be slow and fraught with hard decisions. Our round and ripe world full of possibilities is also a world deeply fractured, chaotic, and messy. The pandemic illuminated the world’s shadows and deep inequalities and injustices were brought to light. Many of us struggled to find a way to contribute, connect, and reconcile these inequities. Collectively, we confronted this pandemic yet each person has had a unique and important experience.

For most it was incredibly challenging. I found the ebbs and flows of life seemed to be quicker, louder, and sharper. There were flurries of fear and then periods of stagnation.

As a parent with school-aged children, my primary focus has been our children’s mental health and their safety. During the height of the pandemic, I often felt like I was out at sea without an anchor. The children had questions that my husband and I could not answer. They wanted to know when this would end and life felt fragile. Their innocence required us to stay strong, confident, and hopeful.

During this time, I wrote regularly using immediate and urgent poetry to integrate any experience that felt overwhelming, beautiful, or mundane. My father and I decided we would try and write a poem each day to each other over text message. It helped me stay connected and inspired me to write without constraint. “For me, poetry is a beautiful stone revealing the unearthed, holding the weight, and shining a light to experience.” As we enter the month of June, British Columbia is beginning to open up. This poem “Don’t Choose” draws on the mixed feelings that have arisen during this time:

We fly through this aching world

in moments of fire and stillness

We revel in magnificence

and then shelter in minutia

Fire

Stillness

Magnificence

Minutia

In this aching world

Don’t choose

This summer will be very different from last, and I know there will be residual fears and unknowns. I am worried that I have lost the ability to be with others and not fear getting sick. I worry that my children fear the same. Yet I also know that with time there is a settling of self and many opportunities to pause, reflect, and integrate this past year with myself and others. We know how to keep safe in our surroundings, school, and work, and we continue to learn how to live in this new way.

Our family continues to grow stronger as we navigate this time together, and I have witnessed such kindness and connection between friends and our community.

Poetry has carried me through the roughest of days and continues to strengthen my ability to reveal my truth and create meaning in our current world.

I’m not certain what the next few months will reveal, but I know that even as I continue to wrestle with hesitancy, fear, and uncertainty, I will push forward into this next phase with a renewed strength and deep gratitude.

Brenna Ebner is Yellow Arrow’s CNF Managing Editor and project lead for EMERGE. She previously interned with Mason Jar Press and was Editor-in-Chief of Grub Street volume 69 at Towson University. She also does freelance editing on the side and is slowly making her way through a CNF reading list.

Nichola Ruddell was born in Vancouver, British Columbia, and raised on Salt Spring Island. She attended university at the University of Victoria, receiving a degree in Child and Youth Care. She is also a Phoenix Rising Yoga Therapist. She enjoys writing poetry and is previously published in the online magazine Literary Mama. Her poem “Movement in the Cinnabar Valley” was published in Yellow Arrow Journal, Home Vol. V, No. 2, and she recently became an associate member of the League of Canadian Poets. After living in many places with her family, she has made a home in Nanaimo, British Columbia with her husband and two young children.

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 9/14/21 Kapua Iao 9/14/21

Taking Moments to Listen: A Conversation with Ute Carson

“I’m never someone who sends out a mission to my readers, but I want them to stop a moment when they read and maybe say: what do the words mean? Could that be applied to something in my life?”

Ute Carson, German-born, now Austin, Texas resident, is the author of Yellow Arrow Publishing’s next chapbook, Listen. The desire she has for her readers to pause and engage with her words is evident within the lines of the 44 included poems. Listen’s imagery forces readers to stop and sit with her words for a few moments before continuing to evaluate the book’s themes: engaging with nature and loved ones and reflecting on one’s past experiences and their subsequent formative effects on the ensuing years. Ute’s words convey to her readers her enchantment with the world around us during every stage of our existence.

A writer from youth, Ute has published two novels, a novella, a volume of stories, four collections of poetry, and numerous essays here and abroad. Her poetry was twice nominated for the Pushcart Award. Yellow Arrow is privileged to publish Listen, now available for PRESALE (click here for wholesale prices) and released October 12, 2021. You can find out more about Ute at utecarson.com. Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for Friday sneak peeks into Listen from this week until October 8. Recently Editorial Associate Siobhan McKenna took some time to get to know Ute and the significance of Listen.

As a young child in Germany during World War II, Ute was bombarded by the tragedies of the world: her father died in the war before she was born, her mother’s second husband was also killed, her two uncles perished in the brutal Stalingrad winter, and she, her mother, and grandmothers were forced to flee their home—losing everything—as the Russians invaded. Yet, Ute remembers, “In spite of a very dramatic childhood, I was embedded in this incredible love. Even when I saw the most terrible things. I saw for the first time wounded soldiers—crying, dying. And that left a deep impression on me. But at the same time, I was always protected by these females around me, so I was able to choose that same influence that warms and protects you all through my life. And I have tried to impart that to my children and my children’s children.”

We carry the house of childhood within us,

and spying through its translucent walls,

we keep life at a distance or embrace it.

(The House of Childhood)

As the women in her family worked together to shelter Ute from the dangerous times, they told stories, and Ute began to understand the power of writing. “My maternal grandmother, my father’s mother, and my mother were all steeped in German poetry, stories, and I absorbed all that.” In addition to the songs and tales that she was “fed,” Ute’s writing was influenced by an elementary school teacher who “always ended each class with a story” and helped her publish her first story in the German magazine, Der Tierfreund (Friend of Animals). From that moment on, Ute says she has never stopped writing.

We all have been warmed by a fire we did not build.

Parents set a fire

that sends out sparks to dispel darkness,

and lights the way for the young into the world.

(Flames Rising)

In Listen, Ute weaves a poignant narrative of what it means to be engaged with the world by drawing on her childhood influences, educational background, and experiences as a friend, lover, and grandparent. Many of her poems emphasize understanding one’s place in the life span and the collective conflicts we face as humans. This is only fitting as Ute herself studied various psychological theories and was a clinical hypnotist at a trauma center in Austin for many years. Being able to write about universal struggles is an important aspect of Ute’s poem as she often changes perspective or leaves the speaker deliberately ambiguous. In the poem “She Still Lives Here,” Ute writes as a husband mourning the loss of his wife. “I changed perspectives because I try to generalize. I don’t always bring it back to me.” She continues to say that writing poetry “is not just telling about your experience, which is very valuable—you start with your experience—but your experience has to be formed. It’s not enough to just put it out there. What you do as a writer and a poet is to transform [the experience] into something that is universally human and that’s how it appeals to my readers (not just to my family) who can then relate my personal experience to their own. I am a critic of people who just write about their experience and do not attempt to empathize to the human condition.”

How do we venture into the lives of others

and still remain true to ourselves?

[. . .]

We build barriers, high and solid,

wire fences between properties,

[. . .]

My favorites are the ones made of rope

that I can climb over or crawl under.

(Self and Others)

In addition, many of Ute’s poems use her current role as a grandparent to view the world. In “Breaking Away,” Ute writes that grandparents are the “hub in the wheel of life” as they “relieve busy parents” and “indulge the young.” Ute believes that grandparenthood is easier than parenthood and says that she loved being a parent, but between teaching, writing, getting a graduate degree, and having three girls that she was “always torn in different directions.” Now, when one of her grandchildren “bursts through the door everything else can be wiped away. Even the ailments, which you know when you are 80 years old, they are there, and you forget for a moment because a child beams and throws [themselves] into your arms.” She says it is not simply that you have more time, but also more “psychic energy” to spend on your grandchildren because “you are no longer preoccupied with your development” and the questions of, “Who am I as a writer? Who am I as a parent? Who am I as a wife?” Because “as a grandparent, you have pretty much shed that search for the self and know who you are. And that is very comforting because you can then convey that to your grandchildren.”

How difficult it is to picture our parents as young lovers,

or the bearded homeless man as a smooth-skinned baby.

It takes a leap of imagination

to peer through the fog of time

and see each stage in life

linked from first to last.

(Snapshot in Time)

But despite loving the view from grandparenthood, Ute also writes of the limits that she has encountered with aging. In “Relinquishment” she laments no longer being able to wear her favorite heels and in “The New Normal” attempts to race her grandson only to find that she immediately falls. When asked about this experience, she says, “I had it in my mind that I had been a runner and that I could still run, and I fell absolutely flat and that’s the flexibility we need to learn in old age. That yes, you still know how it was when you were able to run, but you can’t do that anymore . . . there are final limits.”

The wind of mortality

sweeps through the woods,

stripping away leaves

and downing limbs.

Sap turns to bleeding tears.

(Bleeding Trees)

Throughout the collection, Ute blends childhood memories with her insight that comes with aging, which begs the question: What does it mean to live a full life? To this, Ute answers that she loves being able to care for her animals and garden. She snuggles with her cat, grooms her horses, and tells her roses, “I’m sorry, but you need a haircut.” But, above all, she says that a full life to her has meant her experiences with her mate. “My husband—who has been at my side for so long. We have had things that we have had to struggle with in terms of ailments and all kinds, but we do life together still and we still very much enjoy what we’ve always enjoyed. My husband had an incredibly busy professional life. And, not that we weren’t connected during that time, but there is a different connection now. Now the time together that we spend [is not between] him flying off to the next meeting or to colleagues. It’s a kind of circle that you come around to appreciate your partner—whoever it is . . . I don’t mean you have to have one [singular], but the partner that comes around as we age is important. Someone that you can fold wash with and do other everyday tasks even when you’re old.” She adds, “[My husband and I] still fight over politics. We still have our own things that we do. But it is still valuable time spent together, [we ask] how do we want to structure our last years together? And that includes the family, the animals, the garden, the reading, all that, but a primary focus on the partnership.”

Life stories are recorded in the crevices of my brain

and emotions bounce back from hollows in my body.

I am filled with the echoes of my loved ones.

(Echoes)

Ute interweaves among her themes of youth, love, and aging images of verdant forests, abundant flowers, and other nature scenes that give color and scents to her sentiments. The significance of the abundant nature imagery is echoed by her decisions on the title and the cover art (designed by Yellow Arrow Creative Director, Alexa Laharty). When asked, Ute explains that Listen came from a question when she was giving a reading for her last book, Gypsy Spirit. “One of the listeners said, ‘I read your book, and I am slow, is that a detriment?’ And I said, ‘No, on the contrary, if you’re attentive, if you’re reflective, if you listen, much more will come with a second reading.’ It’s ok to be slow and to reread and maybe pause at an image. Or reflect: What did you mean by this word when you could have used another one?” Furthermore, Ute says she has often used listening to nature as a way to heal.

“Go, and put your ear to the tree, which is [on] the cover [of the chapbook] and listen to what that tree has to tell you. What energy does it send to you? We have done it with the grandchildren very often. When I couldn’t solve [a problem] even with my hypnosis, I would say let’s go outside and you put your arms around the tree, and just listen very carefully. Because the tree maybe tells you something. Maybe a stomachache, and [my grandchildren] often would come back in and say, ‘It’s gone.’” Ute further expands that with nature we have a reciprocal relationship: “Many of my nature references are allegories. . . . In the story about my grandson hugging a tree when he had a stomachache, I tried to show that everything around us is alive and has its own energy. Our grandson could bring his discomfort to the tree and in turn receive solace. The book cover image has a different focus—listening instead of hugging. [Depicted on the cover is] a woman (or girl) [leaning] her ear against a tree. There is a symbiotic connection. She might feel the ‘Earth move under my feet’ as Carol King sings and the sun might touch her face or she might be listening to birds chirping, the wind whispering.” Ute emphasizes that art is symbolic of being able to pause and pay attention to the natural world around us.

. . . when light and warmth return with the dawn,

butterflies flutter about.

Nature thrives in abundance.

(Magical Greenery)

And it is not only with the title and cover art that Ute had very specific intentions. Everything she has done to have Listen come alive has been deliberate—even her decision to publish with Yellow Arrow. Ute expresses that when she was first introduced to Yellow Arrow, she saw the logo and immediately realized that it was the symbol associated with the Camino de Santiago that helps guide “the wanderers and seekers” along the way. Ute and her husband completed the pilgrimage in the late 1980s and soon discovered that Yellow Arrow’s founder, Gwen Van Velsor, had also taken a pilgrimage there. “So when I saw the yellow arrows coming from that old tradition it connected with me that the chapbook is also a pilgrimage. The poems are a pilgrimage from childhood to the dying and we stop along the way.” She continued to say that not only did Yellow Arrow’s connection to the Camino de Santiago solidify her decision to publish with us, but also its mission to emphasize women. “I love to comment on that because there are not that many journals that are geared toward women.” Ute further says that she has often heard of two main theories that women will follow about art: a theory by Virginia Wolfe and one from Anaïs Nin. “According to Wolfe, all art is gender-free. But I have chosen the other tradition: Nin. And [Nin] believes that art overlaps—men’s and women’s art overlaps, but men and women have a slightly different perspective on things. And, she said that women write with their blood. You dip your pen in your blood and you write with it. So, if you are of that tradition—as I am—you have a different perspective on the [Yellow Arrow Journal] and why it’s just for women. I want women to be aware of that tradition. And you do have to come in your mind to make a decision about which one you want to follow.”

By exchanging stories,

We can reach understanding.

(Talking and Listening)

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Thank you, Ute and Siobhan, for such an insightful conversation and to Siobhan for sharing it. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 7/13/21 Kapua Iao 7/13/21

St. Paul Street Provocations by Patti Ross: Advocacy and Social Justice

Yellow Arrow Publishing announces the release of our latest chapbook, St. Paul Street Provocations, by Patti Ross. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to advocate for all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal as well as single-author publications, and by providing strong author support, writing workshops, and volunteering opportunities. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Patti in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

St. Paul Street Provocations is a compelling look at current social issues, such as homelessness, that remain sidelined and ignored by those in power. It largely explores experiences and exchanges Patti had while living in Baltimore, Maryland from 2010 to 2013, just one block south of North Avenue on St. Paul Street. She found herself in a neighborhood slighted by its own city. Patti listened, wrote, and became an advocate. The nine poems intertwined with Patti’s stunning artwork work in tandem to give a voice to what Patti herself witnessed over the past decade.

Patti graduated from Washington, D.C.’s Duke Ellington School for the Performing Arts and The American University. After graduation, several of her journalist pieces were published in the Washington Times and rural American newspapers. Retiring from a career in technology, Patti has rediscovered her love of writing and shares her voice as the spoken-word artist little pi. Her poems are published in the Pen In Hand Journal, PoetryXHunger website, and Oyster River Pages: Composite Dreams Issue, among others.

Paperback and PDF versions of St. Paul Street Provocations are now available from the Yellow Arrow bookstore! Those who ordered a paperback before release will receive their free PDF (with colored interior images!) shortly. If interested in purchasing more than one paperback copy for friends and family, check out our discounted wholesale prices here. You can also search for St. Paul Street Provocations wherever you purchase your books including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Kobo. To learn more about Patti and St. Paul Street Provocations, check out our recent interview with her. Keep a lookout for info on Patti’s book launch!

You can find Patti at littlepisuniverse.com or on Facebook and Instagram, and connect with Yellow Arrow on Facebook and Instagram, to share some love for this chapbook.

*****

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. To learn about publishing, volunteering, or donating, visit yellowarrowpublishing.com. If interested in writing a review of St. Paul Street Provocations or any of our other publications, please email editor@yellowarrowpublishing.com for more information.

Kapua Iao 4/13/21 Kapua Iao 4/13/21

No Batteries Required by Ellen Dooling Reynard: Living Life’s Non Moments

Yellow Arrow Publishing announces the release of a new chapbook, No Batteries Required, by Ellen Dooling Reynard. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to advocate for all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal as well as single-author publications, and by providing strong author support, workshops, and volunteer opportunities. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Ellen in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

The 28 poems included in No Batteries Required float through several themes and are divided into four sections: moments and non moments, Life’s Journey Home, Other Creatures, and Seasoned with Humor. As a whole, No Batteries Required examines the world around Ellen from the perspective of her inner world. She considers what she calls ‘moments and non moments’—those brief stops along the way to look at something as simple as a flower or to witness something as complex as the death of a loved one.

As a senior, Ellen looks back on her life, its joys and sorrows, its loves and losses, while she navigates the unknown currents of old age and ponders about the journeys of life, death, and what lies beyond. Observing the natural world, she recognizes what is to be learned about the human condition from animals, insects, and plants. In the final title poem, Ellen muses about the craft of writing with a pencil, which she describes as a simple computational device with one end for ‘enter,’ the other end for ‘delete.’

Ellen spent her childhood on a cattle ranch in Jackson, Montana. Raised on myths and fairy tales, the sense of wonder has never left her. A one-time editor of Parabola Magazine, her poetry has been published by Lighten Up On Line, Current Magazine, Persimmon, Silver Blade, and The Muddy River Poetry Review. She is now retired and has relocated to Clarksville, Maryland, where she will continue to write fiction and poetry. She is currently working on a series of ekphrastic poems based on the work of her late husband, Paul Reynard (1927–2005).

Paperback and PDF versions of No Batteries Required are now available from the Yellow Arrow bookstore! If interested in purchasing more than one paperback copy for friends and family, check out our discounted wholesale prices here. You can also search for No Batteries Required wherever you purchase your books including Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and smaller bookstores. Connect with Yellow Arrow Publishing on Facebook and Instagram, and Ellen on Facebook, to share some love for this chapbook. To learn more about Ellen and No Batteries Required, check out our recent interview with her. And as part of our April Poetry Series, join us for a book launch of No Batteries Required on April 30 at 6 p.m. More information about the reading, as well as the Zoom link, can be found on our Events Calendar.

***

Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. To learn about publishing, volunteering, or donating, visit yellowarrowpublishing.com. If interested in writing a review of No Batteries Required or any of our other publications, please email editor@yellowarrowpublishing.com for more information.

Kapua Iao 3/13/21 Kapua Iao 3/13/21

Cherishing the Present: A Conversation with Ellen Dooling Reynard

From February 2021

Ellen Dooling Reynard sits in her kitchen nestled in the foothills of the Sierra Mountains. Behind her, a black cat jumps onto the counter. She grins, “He wants to play with the keys.” Her warmth spills through the computer screen that connects us as Ellen mentions that he, along with her other cat, are sources of inspiration for her writing and laughter. Ellen, the author of the next Yellow Arrow Publishing chapbook, No Batteries Required, released April 2021, spoke to Yellow Arrow Editorial Associate, Siobhan McKenna, while taking a break from packing up her California home. This wonderful chapbook is now available for PRESALE. Information about a virtual reading at the end of April is forthcoming

No Batteries Required examines the world around Ellen from the perspective of her inner world. As a senior, she looks back on her life, its joys and sorrows, its loves and losses, while she navigates the unknown currents of old age and ponders about the journeys of life, death, and what lies beyond. Ellen spent her childhood on a cattle ranch in Jackson, Montana. Raised on myths and fairy tales, the sense of wonder has never left her. A one-time editor of Parabola Magazine, her poetry has been published by Lighten Up On Line, Current Magazine, Persimmon, Silver Blade, and The Muddy River Poetry Review. She is now retired and has relocated to Clarksville, Maryland, where she will continue to write fiction and poetry. She is currently working on a series of ekphrastic poems based on the work of her late husband, Paul Reynard (1927–2005).

In a week [from this interview], Ellen will be moving east to separate herself from the worsening wildfires and to be closer to family. Yet for someone who is moving across the country, she appears very at peace. “That’s life,” she says when asked how she is faring with the move. “Selling a house and packing a house and then dealing with something that’s wrong with the house. I can worry about all of that and then I realize that this is the second to last week that I’m going to be here—so that’s right now. What is going to happen is going to happen on the trip.” After a beat, she adds with a laugh, “I am a little nervous.” Siobhan asked Ellen to talk more about her appreciation for the mundane moments of life, her curiosity toward the natural world, and her ability to see aging as a gift—the themes of No Batteries Required.

YAP: The first section of your chapbook is called “moments and non moments” with even the non moments being full of meaning. How have you found your non moments to be “presents of presence”?

Because I’ve had a life-long spiritual direction that my mother was also involved in—the teachings of [G.I.] Gurdjieff . . . [a] middle eastern teacher of philosophy and knowledge. [His teaching] is a lot about being in the moment (before it [became] a buzzword in modern psychology) and living life right now; not yesterday and not tomorrow. What is in front of me right now? Who am I right now? These kinds of moments, the non moments, [are] what end up being “presents of presence.” [Presents of presence is about] finding yourself if you are really irritated because you are delayed by something. Maybe you are going to be late for an appointment. Or you may not even have a reason to be annoyed and you just don’t like slowing down. So, in the middle of a moment like that you have to realize that you are alive, and you are breathing and there are birds singing outside and interesting things to be feeling about one’s children and all of one’s loved ones. There is plenty of material in the present moment even if even if you are waiting at a broken traffic light.

YAP: How does it feel to look back at seemingly non moments: family breakfast, dishes, chores, Montana winters, and find meaning within them?

I learned deep down an appreciation for being where you are because we would be snowed in all winter. We were six children and my mother homeschooled us, because there was no way we could get anywhere. The nearest school was a [one-room schoolhouse in town], 10 miles away. We didn’t get down to town the whole winter. We would have to put away a lot of food and my mother had to figure out how to age the eggs in barrels. She had to cook and can, garden, milk cows, separate cream from milk, make butter . . . [having been gently raised back East, as a rancher’s wife], she learned how to do all that stuff—it was amazing.

YAP: Your second section called “Life’s Journey Home” centers on growing older. When referring to yourself in your bio you call yourself a “senior” and you call Fredrica a “senior” in the poem of the same name. Do you see yourself in Fredrica now as you have entered this older stage of life?

No, not Fredrica, but my mother and my aunt. My Aunt Peggy lived to be 103 and when she was in her 70s, she decided she was going to grow old gracefully. She was a very busy woman—did all kinds of project. . . . she kept chugging along all those years and always with a lot of laughter and a lot of good humor. And I’ve become the Aunt Peggy of my generation among my sisters’ children, and I don’t mind seeing myself that way. [Old age is] a kind of special time and a privileged time because you don’t have to prove anything anymore.

YAP: In “Old Age” you write, “these are the best years,” and talk about allowing the world’s youth to carry the burden of knowing “the unknowable” so you “old ones” can move “into a new world.” These words are beautiful and reminiscent of a future realm after this life. Paired with the title of this section, “Life’s Journey Home,” I’m curious as to what you believe our next life entails and if there is a spiritual aspect to your words?

There is a Native American belief that when you’re born you come through the Milky Way and there’s a person there called Blue Woman. [She] encourages the new life to go ahead and be born. Then, when somebody dies, they go back through the same portal and Blue Woman is there to welcome them back to the same world that they came from. That’s—in a way— my view: that after death of the body there’s some kind of life that goes on. It may not be angels with halos and sitting on white clouds, but there’s something that continues. . . . [Gurdjieff said] that depending on how we live there are various places where the spirit ends up. The ideal is to go back to the center of the universe—what you might call God; that original force that started everything.

YAP: In your poem “Montana,” I love the juxtaposition of the beauty of the natural world against the reality of the natural world. You talk about the mountains as “blue-shouldered and white peaked” but also “uncaring in their majesty” and the sun melting away snow that once again reveals the graves of your mom and your husband. Why are these contrasts important to you and how do you see the beauty and reality working together?

I think that was part of growing up on a ranch. Seeing a lot of birth and death juxtaposed with animals on the ranch. [We lived on] a cattle ranch so we saw animals being born and I was interested in one being butchered, but my mother didn’t want me to watch. My father also had a very beloved dog who was a wonderful cow dog. My father accidentally killed him when he was backing up some huge machines and [ran over] the dog. . . . I saw a lot of extreme opposites in relation to nature. I think it happens within human beings also—there’s joy and there’s sorrow and they define each other.

YAP: Your final section is called “Seasoned with Humor.” How are you able to find humor within the trials of getting older?

I think my Aunt Peggy, who was a big influence in my life, was the one with the best sense of humor. . . . I went through a period of life where I was a sad person and being around my aunt was always a big help. Even when things were really hard, she had a sense of humor. At one point for instance, she fell and broke her back in her 90s, so she had to be in her room for a long time on a hospital bed. She asked if they could push her hospital bed around so she could look out the window because there was a squirrel feeder. There was one squirrel that would do all of this crazy stuff, and she would sit there and laugh—with a broken back. She was no sissy.

Also, with aging, I am lightening up. I don’t know exactly why. Because when you’re young and busy with a career and having children—there’s a lot that makes you go like this *Ellen furrows her brow and points to the space between her eyebrows* and it makes you get this crease. [With age] it seems more possible to just relax in front of something that is difficult. They say that things don’t hurt so much when you relax. It is when you tense that you make all your nerves jangle and relaxing feels better.

YAP: How long have you been writing?

I’ve been writing various things for a long time. I was an editor, and I wrote some [articles] for the magazine I was working for which was Parabola Magazine. I only started writing poetry a little more than a year ago. I took a memoir class and started to privately publish for my children the story of my life and their life. My [memoir] teacher was really good, and I found out that she was going to be teaching a poetry class at the local OLLI Institute—the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute (it’s a non-for profit that makes it possible to have classes for senior citizens at very little cost). Anyway, [my teacher] was going to give a poetry class so I thought well, let me try writing poetry. [My teacher] was very encouraging and we became very good friends. Eventually, one thing led to another and she actually proofread this manuscript for me. Because of the classes, I’ve [joined] some writers groups mostly for people like me—not so young. It’s been very inspiring. I love it.

YAP: What does having your poems published for others to read mean to you?

It’s a real shot in the arm. I just started writing poetry and already to have something that other people can read; I love it. It really inspires me to keep on going and keep on writing.

YAP: What was the inspiration behind the cover with three pencils?

I was just fooling around with my camera, and I [visualized] pictures of pencils. I got different pencils and lined them up in different ways. And then, [Kapua Iao, Editor-in-Chief] got [Yellow Arrow’s Creative Director, Alexa Laharty] to draw it and I really loved it. It was just a little visual moment that I was having with my pencils and my camera—I was just doodling around. I’m so glad [they] wanted to run with that idea.

YAP: Why did you decide to publish your work with YAP?

Because you accepted me! I sent it out to lots of different places and didn’t get any other offers. I’m thrilled. I also noticed that [Yellow Arrow had] lots of workshops and events so I’m hoping that once we are allowed to go out and meet people that I would love to find some writing groups!

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Thank you Ellen and Siobhan for such an insightful conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 2/9/21 Kapua Iao 2/9/21

Evoking Provocations from Patti Ross: A Conversation

Overwhelmed by the gentrification occurring from 2010 to 2013 in the areas around North Avenue and St. Paul Street in Baltimore, Maryland, Patti Ross recognized that the people from the neighborhood were being slighted by their own city. While the tenants preached their woes of displacement and fear of homelessness, Patti listened, wrote, and became an activist for their concerns in order to let them be heard. From this, St. Paul Street Provocations, Patti’s debut chapbook with Yellow Arrow Publishing, now available for PRESALE and ready for release in July 2021, was born.

Patti Ross graduated from Washington, D.C.’s Duke Ellington School for the Performing Arts and The American University. After graduation, several of her journalist pieces were published in the Washington Times and the Rural America newspapers. Retiring from a career in technology, Patti has rediscovered her love of writing and shares her voice as the spoken-word artist “little pi.” Her poems are published in the Pen In Hand Journal, PoetryXHunger website, and Oyster River Pages: Composite Dreams Issue, among others. You can find Patti at littlepisuniverse.com or on Facebook and Instagram.

A Yellow Arrow editorial associate, Bailey Drumm, recently interviewed Patti about her upcoming chapbook and what her home on St. Paul Street meant (and means) to her. You can also hear more about St. Paul Street Provocations and Patti tonight (February 9) at 7:00 p.m. with the Wilde Reading Series, also featuring Yellow Arrow’s very own Gwen Van Velsor.

YAP: What was the catalyst for the creation of St. Paul Street Provocations?

I am an advocate for the homeless and marginalized. I have long considered myself an advocate and am a member of the Poor People’s Campaign. I wanted some of those [people] that I met when I lived one block off North Avenue, in a somewhat blighted neighborhood, [I wanted their] voices to be heard, for them to be seen in some way—recognized. When I would chat with my homeless or economically and mentally challenged friends, they would all reveal a feeling of invisibility to society’s majority class.

YAP: What does Baltimore, especially St. Paul Street, mean to you?

Baltimore is my adopted city. Once I learned its history—I understood it better. I understood why there were streets that appear to be allies. I understood what Penn Ave and North Ave meant to the community. St. Paul Street and its community allowed me to rediscover and shape who I am. I often go back to the area and just sit and reflect. I can see evolution and the lack of progress at the same time. There is romance there for me.

YAP: This collection seems incredibly personal, genuine, and emotion-provoking. How would you describe the feeling of seeing the pieces put together in one place?

It is exciting and surrendering at the same time. The collection is very personal. Most of the poems were written out of experience—either my own sights or the stories of others.

YAP: Why ‘Provocations,’ specifically? What does that word mean to you in the context of the title?

[Provocations] is important in the title because the poems are about frustrations, irritations. The poems speak to injustices and the affronts that those who are marginalized deal with daily.

YAP: Along with writing, I hear you are part of the spoken-word community, sharing your voice as the spoken-word artist “little pi.” How did you originally get involved with the spoken-word community?

I just jumped in. I went to the high school of performing arts in D.C., so I have known about performance poetry for quite some time. However, when I moved to Baltimore, I was looking for a way to share my thoughts and I started attending open mics. I was too scared to read at the time—I think I let my [age], being much older than those on stage, create a lack of confidence. Once I moved back to Ellicott City, an area I had lived for over 15 years, I felt comfortable performing and reading in front of an audience. Root Studio owned by Karen Isailovic was my first stage, and they held an open mic every Friday, so I started there. Once I built up my confidence I started going to Red Emma’s and that is where I saw and communed with some phenomenal slam champions and spoken-word artists.

YAP: How has spoken word helped you creatively, therapeutically, etc.?

Creatively it has helped [me] to discover and define my public persona. I am clear on what I want to advocate for and who. I also see it as a path to advocate and remind society of those on the fringes. Therapeutically? I’m glad you asked this. I get so much joy out of not just presenting my work but listening and sharing the work of others. I believe in a higher power and the stars of the universe. I think much of what we do as individuals is kismet.

YAP: What would you consider to be the heart or heat of this chapbook?

It is all about recognition of what is happening in the streets or our cities and the things we choose to ignore. It is about a haunting that we need to rectify. For example, the poem “Indemnity,” or sometimes I call it “Football,” is all about remuneration. In that poem, the idea of a football game—played by men whose ancestors fought in the Civil War and by men whose ancestors were former slaves prior to that war—the lineage of one group can be easily dismissed. In “Ghosting” families of color have accepted permanent separation for hopes of heritable betterment, right? Slave families were forcibly separated for the betterment of the slave owner and here we have post-slavery families willingly separating themselves.

YAP: Was there any particular piece that was hard to tackle and get to its final form?

“History Month” was tough. I was trying to say a lot in that piece, and I had a hard time finding a way to get it all in without sound preachy. I also understand the need for the naming of the month, but I do not like it. I would prefer the history of this country be told correctly without the revisions. I had conversations with elders who understood what I was saying but did not agree that the recognition month should be eliminated.

YAP: What does the featured mural (on the cover) mean to you, and to this collection? Were there any particular emotions it evoked, or direction of words it inspired?

The mural is the creation of Jessie Unterhalter and Katey Truhn of jessie and katey; they are Baltimore-based muralists. They created the mural on the grounds of the dilapidated park across the street from my former apartment. (A side story is someone [once] planted rose bushes in the park and nurtured them until they grew beautiful blooms. I never saw anyone doing the work, but one day the roses were all in bloom and the park looked beautiful even with the trash and drug needles strewn between the grasses. The very next day, sometime in the early morning, when we woke up, the heads or blooms of all the bushes had been cut off and left on the ground. It was a sad and frightening sight.) I watched them daily create something beautiful out of something blighted. The mural is called “Walk the Line,” and in that neighborhood at that time, you very much had to walk a certain line. You had to be an insider. You had to know your way around. For me, the mural evoked a way out of whatever situation you [might] find yourself in.

YAP: Will you be including any other artwork of your own in the collection? If so, is it inspired by any particular poem or the collection as a whole?

I hope to have at least one piece of my artwork in the book and it is a bleeding or beating heart. In honor of George Perry Floyd, Jr.

YAP: Why did you choose Yellow Arrow to publish St. Paul Street Provocations?

I love the concept of a woman[-run] publishing company. As a feminist, I am always seeking opportunities to collaborate with like minds. I was elated when they decided to publish the book. I had been trying to figure out a home for the collection. In many ways, I had shifted in my writing, but the experiences still clung to me and I needed to find a place for the words to rest. I will never stop performing the poems until the injustices are corrected.

Something special though about [Yellow Arrow] is Ann Quinn—the poetry editor at [Yellow Arrow and] an elegant poet. I fell in love with a poem I heard her read from her book Final Deployment. The poem is called “Ma,” and it is about the ‘in between spaces’ the cracks, the voids where there is nothing. This resonated with me and my life on St. Paul Street. My apartment was in the front of the building on the first floor so I would sit in my very tall windows and watch people walk past and never look up. On the north side of North Avenue, was the beginning of Charles Village and daily, people were on a trek to get there—to Charles Village, not here, one block south of North Avenue. When I read Ann’s story of being a poetry ‘late bloomer,’ and I was even later than her (LOL), I thought perhaps [this] could be it. So, I sent the manuscript and prayed. I also loved the work that [Yellow Arrow] was doing in Highlandtown, creating [an] artistic community around writing. I regret I never made it to the house.

YAP: Though the chapbook is to be released in July, the prerelease coincides with tonight’s (February 9) Wilde Readings. Is there anything you would like to note in preparing for this event, especially given the current state of the world?

I think it is sad that [some of] these poems were written about a time roughly 10 years ago and, sadly, the [same] social justice points are still relevant today. We have made little progress in the way of providing for our sidelined brothers and sisters.

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Thank you Patti and Bailey for such an insightful conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts. If you are a journalist/writer/bookstagrammer and interested in writing a review of St. Paul Street Provocations or any of our other publications, please email editor@yellowarrowpublishing.com.

Kapua Iao 10/13/20 Kapua Iao 10/13/20

the samurai by Linda M. Crate: discovering your strength within

the samurai cover_Squarespace full front and back.jpg

Yellow Arrow Publishing is overjoyed to kick off the fall with the release of a new chapbook, the samurai, by Linda M. Crate. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to advocate for all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal and a multitude of writing workshops, community events, and volunteering opportunities. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Linda in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

The word ‘samurai’ can loosely be translated into meaning “those who serve.” In Linda’s chapbook, illustrated by Ann Marie Sekeres (annmarieprojects.com), this interpretation is especially pertinent. This collection of poems speaks of rebirth, reincarnation, and lessons from the past as a means to a better future. For Linda, this is through a past life discovered in a very vivid dream that had both awed and confused her.

Within this dream, Linda was visited by a strong, courageous woman—a samurai—who showed her how to listen to her past, learn from her mistakes, and inherit the future she deserves. The Onna-bugeisha (female martial artist) were female samurai. They were a type of female warrior who mostly belonged to the Japanese nobility. This collection was titled “the samurai” because this is what the woman in the dream wished to be known as. She was a fighter and a survivor, as is Linda.

The 21 poems included in this chapbook encourage readers to dive deep within themselves and to use the past as a tether to the right path for the future. The cover art was inspired by the 19th-century Japanese woodcut tradition and several prints by artists such as Utagawa Kunikiyo that focused on rooftop fighting and falling warriors. Butterflies represent the souls of the dead which inspired Ann Marie to include them both in the cover and interior illustrations.

Linda is a Pennsylvanian born in Pittsburgh but raised in Conneautville. Her work has been published in numerous magazines and anthologies, both online and in print. She is the author of six poetry chapbooks, the latest of which is More Than Bone Music (March 2019). She also is the author of the novel Phoenix Tears (June 2018) and two micropoetry collections. Recently, she has published two full-length poetry collections, Vampire Daughter (February 2020) and The Sweetest Blood (February 2020). Linda is also a two-time Pushcart nominee.

Paperback and PDF versions of the samurai are now available from the Yellow Arrow Publishing bookstore! You can also search for the samurai wherever you purchase your books including Amazon and most distribution channels. Connect with Yellow Arrow Publishing, Linda, or Ann Marie on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter to share some love for this chapbook. To learn more about Linda and the samurai, check out our recent interview with her.

***

Kapua Iao 9/12/20 Kapua Iao 9/12/20

the samurai: a conversation with Linda M. Crate

They say to let go of your past, but I think that this is a mistake.

Sometimes the past tethers you on the right path for your future.

The word ‘samurai’ can loosely be translated into meaning “those who serve.” In Linda M. Crate’s soon to be released chapbook, the samurai, illustrated by Ann Marie Sekeres (annmarieprojects.com), this interpretation is especially pertinent as her collection of poems stems from a dream in which a samurai appeared and inspired her to heal from past experiences to activate her full potential. Linda’s upcoming Yellow Arrow Publishing chapbook about rebirth, past lives, and learning from experience is now available for PRESALE and will be released October 2020.

A Yellow Arrow editorial associate, Siobhan McKenna, interviewed Linda about the samurai, reading messages from our dreams, and learning to choose how we move forward after darkness threatens to saturate our lives.

YAP: The basis of this chapbook came from a vivid dream you had, could you speak a little more about that?

When I have dreams, most of them I remember in bits of pieces, but I don’t really remember them very well. But the [samurai] in [this] dream was very quiet and subtle—she had a presence. I’ve [even] had a few daydreams about the figure from this book. She is very prominent when I see her in my dreams, but the one dream I had at first was just the one where she’s fighting for her emperor—the ruler of her country—and ends up falling off the roof. The dream was terrifying because I felt the falling [of the samurai] and it triggered something. I woke up scared and had to remind myself that I wasn’t falling off a building. It was very lifelike and it felt like it was happening to me in the moment.

YAP: Why do you believe you were having these dreams?

I believe that we have past lives. I didn’t always believe that, which I talk a little bit about in the chapbook. And when a fellow student at school mentioned a past life, I thought, eh, I don’t know about that, but this dream was so powerful and she was so prominent that I thought, well you know maybe there is something to that. Because why else would I be having a dream about somebody who is so different from me and [had] a very different life? Now, sometimes [dreams] are just your subconscious babbling but sometimes they are messages.

YAP: What made you want to turn this dream into a collection of poems?

I thought that I needed to honor [the samurai]. I felt like I needed to put down in words what happened in my dream and make it more of a reality—I wanted to share my experience. And I feel like there are unexplainable things in life and connections that we don’t really understand, and I feel like our past lives could be key to parts of our personality.

YAP: Why did you think the format of a series of poems rather than a short story served this dream better?

I think that with a short story you start at one point and then end up at another and what you originally set out to write isn’t always what comes out in the end, but you can get some of the concepts that you want in there. But ultimately, the characters take the reigns and make it theirs—at least mine do—mine are very vocal. So I thought I’m going to sit down and write this and see if this works. And I feel like as a cohesive form, [a series of poems] did work as a stream of consciousness [for me to convey] what I needed to say.

YAP: Zen Buddhism, introduced into Japan from China, held a great appeal for many samurai and in Zen Buddhism, there is a belief that salvation comes from within, which is a prominent theme in your chapbook. Did you think about this belief system as you were writing?

Oh very much so—I’m very Zen! In college, I took a lot of theology courses because I wanted to know what other cultures believed in. I wanted to know more about what people believed and why people are the way they are. I’m also very connected to nature, and I feel like we have to save ourselves. As much as we like the hero to save us, sometimes we have to be our own hero because there isn’t always going to be someone there for you. Unfortunately, people have let me down a lot in my life, and I’ve had to rely on myself. And in a way it’s sad, but I’m glad I’m this way because it [has made] me stronger.

YAP: Historically, samurai were mainly men, and female warriors were known by a different name [Onna-bugeisha]. Did you research more about Japanese culture after dreaming about the samurai woman and how did you navigate using this traditionally masculine term?

I did. I feel like [the term] samurai just captured how I felt about her and how she felt about herself. I know there is a different term, but why does it have to be that way? Why does it have to be that the man gets more recognition than the woman? Why does the woman have to be lower than a man? It was very important for me to place [the women in my dream] on equal footing, and I knew people were more familiar with samurai. It’s important to have a term that people understood. Some people might have found it interesting [to use the female term] while other people would’ve said, “I don’t know what that is.” A lot of people do their research, but then there’s others who just want something to read that they can relate to or are intrigued by.

YAP: In this chapbook, there is a theme of choosing “tranquility and places of hope” such as in the poem, “the kindest moonlight.” Do you think we have a choice when it comes to focusing on the light versus dark in our lives?

Oh, absolutely. I mean no one chooses to go through dark periods and dark phases, but I feel like there is always that little glint of hope, that little horizon, that light at the end of the tunnel. And I think if you try to focus your sight on your future and getting out of the present darkness—that’s a lot easier. If you dwell on the darkness, the bad times, the bad things, you’re going to feel like there’s anger dragging you down because there’s no hope. And I’ve never wanted to live in a world without hope. I’m the eternal optimist I guess. The one that’s always going to push forward; always going to believe that we can achieve better things and better worlds. You can’t choose if you have a mental illness or somebody dying, but you can choose to either dwell or choose to overcome. My mom told me when I was younger that you have two choices: you can be a victim or a survivor. So I’ve always chosen to be a survivor because I refuse to be in that vulnerable place where nothing can be better than this right now.

YAP: What are your thoughts on the cover image and how your chapbook is represented at first glance?

I absolutely adore the cover image. I think it's a good representation of my dream and of the content in the chapbook. I also love that the exterior has butterflies as they're representative of the idea of rebirth and reincarnation, which are also themes that I cover in the chapbook. I think the idea of connections [to the] past and present is nicely conveyed here. I really appreciate the time and input each of the editors took in trying to help me polish my book. I'm also thankful that Anne Marie was so receptive to my ideas and curious to understand the chapbook and the ideas that were in it. I think that's what makes the illustrations work so flawlessly with my words.

YAP: I know the interior images haven’t been released yet, but how do you think they relate to the themes in your book?

I think [the woman] is a good depiction of the strength and ferocity of a warrior—she also has that schooled face which doesn't betray her emotions, which is something that I touch upon in the chapbook. I think the interior [images work] well with not only the title, but my depiction of the woman in my dream.

YAP: In your profession, you write a great deal of fiction, how do you find the process of writing fiction versus poetry different and/or similar?

It’s different in that with poetry you can talk about yourself and anybody else in your life or situation. But when I’m working on novels or short stories usually a character comes to me and I build around a theme until it develops into something else. And they’re similar in a way because it is a process and it doesn’t always come out right the first time so you have to think [about] what works and what doesn’t work and go from there. But to me, it depends on the day and what I’m feeling—what mood I’m in. Sometimes I feel like writing more fiction and then there’s other days when poetry is what comes more naturally. It’s funny because people ask, “How do you decide?” and it’s just my mind has a switch and whatever the switch says is what we go with.

YAP: In the past, you have published with Yellow Arrow, why did you choose to publish with us again?

I always like them and their philosophy. I’ve always felt that they are very respectful of my work and me. I usually write darker themes and writing [for Yellow Arrow] allowed me to focus on something positive and [the samurai] is a pretty positive figure in my life so I wanted to see what I could come up with. It was a different experience for me and it’s good to challenge [myself] once in a while so that’s what I did.

YAP: What do you hope people take from the chapbook?

We can learn from the past, but our lives aren’t set in stone. If you are going through something negative in your life, it can get better. And sometimes you need to listen to that little voice inside your head that keeps telling you to go forward because it’s important to follow your dreams, to have hope, and begin again. As painful as it is to lose your old self, you have to in order to grow.

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Thank you Linda and Siobhan for such an insightful conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

Kapua Iao 8/12/20 Kapua Iao 8/12/20

Hope and Healing

Smoke the Peace Pipe

Yellow Arrow Publishing Releases a New Chapbook!

Baltimore, MD

A new chapter opens in the story of Yellow Arrow Publishing with the release of our first chapbook, Smoke the Peace Pipe, by Roz Weaver. Since its establishment in 2016, Yellow Arrow has devoted its efforts to support all women writers through inclusion in the biannual Yellow Arrow Journal, our Writers-in-Residence program, and a multitude of writing workshops and community events. We at Yellow Arrow are excited to continue our mission by supporting Roz in all her writing and publishing endeavors.

Smoke the Peace Pipe is a collection of poems inspired by the author’s experience of trauma and how this settled in her body, sometimes as her own worst enemy. Through this chapbook, Roz encourages the possibility that we all can find hope and healing by showing up in the present moment, in the environment and with people around us, and through a shared appreciation of nature, spiritual exploration, and sacred connection with the Earth. By sitting and sharing a peace pipe with ourselves, we have an opportunity to bear what we thought was unbearable and make space for the possibility of a bigger picture. The 26 included poems bring every reader on a journey, from pain, trauma, and separation, toward recovery in the form of transformation, healing, self-love, and spirituality. The cover art by Joanne Baker was inspired by Roz’s poetry, the feeling of emotion, ideas and words, ebbing and flowing like an ocean. All-consuming but cleansing.

Roz is a current resident of West Yorkshire, England, working as a social worker and therapist while studying for her MA in Creative Writing at Teeside University. She began writing poetry in early 2017 as a solitary means of exploring her experiences of trauma and was subsequently published for the first time in January 2018. Roz then began developing some of her writing for spoken word. Her most recent work has been on exhibit with Awakenings, a Chicago-based arts collective of survivors of sexual violence, as well as the London Design Festival, and performed at Leeds International Festival and the renowned Edinburgh Fringe. Roz is currently teaching a (sold out!) Yellow Arrow workshop, “Poetry as Therapy,” in which classmates can explore the therapeutic aspects of poetry as a way of creatively expressing their thoughts and feelings. You can learn more about Roz in our interview with her from last month.

Paperback and PDF versions of Smoke the Peace Pipe are now available from the Yellow Arrow Publishing bookstore. You can also purchase paperback copies from Amazon and e-book copies from most distribution channels. You are welcome to leave reviews on Amazon, Goodreads, your own websites/platforms, or by sending us a direct email with your thoughts. Connect with Yellow Arrow Publishing or Roz on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter to share some love for her chapbook. If you don’t have time to send a review, just know that we appreciate you.

***

Kapua Iao 7/17/20 Kapua Iao 7/17/20

Transformation Through Poetry: A Conversation with Roz Weaver

Roz Weaver is a poet and spoken-word artist who grew up by the beach in Fornby, near Liverpool, England. She now resides in Leeds where in addition to writing poetry she works as a social worker and is a licensed therapist. Weaver’s upcoming Yellow Arrow Publishing chapbook on trauma and transformation, Smoke the Peace Pipe, is now available for presale and will be released August 2020. Beginning Tuesday, July 21, Weaver will host a six-week “Poetry as Therapy” online workshop with Yellow Arrow.

Yellow Arrow editorial associate, Siobhan McKenna, spoke with Weaver about her new chapbook, spoken word, and her thoughts on using poetry as a therapy tool at a time when our world is in need of great healing.

YAP: How did you begin writing poetry?

I enjoyed drama as I was growing up and about three and a half years ago, I started writing and reading poetry. After I watched a TED Talk by Rupi Kaur, I read some of her poetry and started writing. I think some of the stuff that she talks about in her poetry is something that gave me the confidence to think about how I would word what I wanted to talk about. [My poetry] was all really terrible to start with, but then I went from there.

YAP: How did you start performing as a spoken-word artist?

Similar to how I started writing, I had in my head for about a year a piece that I thought would be really good as a spoken-word piece and there was a spoken-word night in Manchester and I put my name on the list, but I backed out a few days beforehand because I was terrified. It took about a year after that to try again, and I still have never performed that poem! But after that, I never started to specifically design my poems for spoken word, but I would go up on the stage more often. [Spoken word] still makes me feel anxious most of the time—I don’t really like it! But you have to keep putting yourself in that discomfort zone. I do get that buzz from performing, but all before it I’m a bunch of nerves!

YAP: What does spoken word bring to poetry?

I think it can bring something really different from page poetry. There are some great places around where I live that do spoken-word events and the poetry can blend to almost being like music or song—its lyrics, its rap, some of them have live bands that will improvise to the rhythm of how someone is speaking. And sometimes, there will be someone sitting in the audience who needs to hear what you’re talking about whether it’s a shared experience, a reframing of perspective, or they’re ignorant to the thing someone is talking about and they need to have that learning. There is also a community feel [during spoken-word performances] when everybody clicks their fingers when they agree with a bit in a poem—rather than clapping or whooping, which might interrupt the speaker—I find [the clicks] really cute and adds to the vibe.

YAP: How do you translate spoken to written?

When I am doing a spoken-word poem it takes me forever because I start it and then I try to find the next line and it will take me hours or days or weeks to put one together. And generally for spoken word, in order to speak long about a subject, I need to be pretty passionate about a subject that I can’t just summarize on a page.

YAP: Do you find different meanings coming through when performing spoken-word poetry that you didn’t realize when you originally wrote the piece?

[One poetry line] that I may think is a very significant line in a piece, someone else will jump to something completely different and say that was the bit that they really identified with, which is often similar to page poetry. Lines can be interpreted in really different ways and whether its spoken-word or page poetry, once [a poet has] written something we don’t have a say in what it means to other people. I really don’t like when someone introduces their piece and the introduction about their piece is as long as their piece. I think it prevents somebody in the audience from interpreting the piece in a different way and sometimes the way in which someone interprets your poem is better than what your original meaning was and you say [jokingly], “Oh, yeah, I totally meant that.”

YAP: How can poetry be used as a type of therapy?

Poetry is a form of expression, and I’ve found it’s easier to put things into words in a poem rather than speaking to somebody face-to-face. For example, sometimes in a conversation with someone they want to find a solution, and with a poem, you can leave it hanging with the raw emotion and you don’t have someone else giving you advice. Sometimes, you have the words for something, but you don’t know how to feel about it yet or you can be quite numb to something and it’s only after I wrote a poem that I’ve really connected what is going on for me.

YAP: What inspired you to create the “Poetry as Therapy” workshop [now sold out!] for YAP?

I’m in my final module of my creative writing masters and in my first year, we were asked to build a set of workshops. I have quite a lot of personal interest around therapy and poetry therapy because it is a bigger thing in America, but it doesn’t exist in the UK so I wanted to build on that idea. So I created the workshops for a university module and they were sitting there and I thought it would be nice at one point to do something with them. The original ones that I put together were for women who had experienced violence so for the Yellow Arrow sessions I adapted them.

YAP: Who should attend your workshops?

Anybody! I think if people are interested in poetry, creative writing in general, or if people are trying to work through things that are going on for them then it might be a good tool to start that journey. I am a qualified therapist but the workshops aren’t therapy. People don’t have to share anything that they don’t want to. A lot of [the workshop] will be [completing] different exercises and prior readings and going away and trying some of the [activities] out by yourself. I’m sure I’ll do all the exercises along with people—I probably need it right now as well!

YAP: Why were you drawn to publish with Yellow Arrow Publishing?

I love Yellow Arrow. It’s been two years since I was first published by [Yellow Arrow Publishing] in one of their journals. I’ve been published two or three times, and I’ve always found the process lovely. Gwen [the YAP founder] would handwrite thank-you notes and post me this hand-bound journal from America and it’s just lovely. I find it to be a very supportive environment, warm, welcoming, and I love that it promotes writers who identify as women. It feels like so much care is taken with people’s work. They care about you, and I really love the ethos of the organization.

YAP: The title of your chapbook, Smoke the Peace Pipe, sounds like a direct call to action and almost invites the reader to join with you as well, was this intentional and how did you settle on the title of the chapbook?

I wish that is why I chose that! I settled on it after I had already ordered the [poems in the] chapbook to flow from a place of challenge and dark to moving into the light and [“Smoke the Peace Pipe”] worked perfectly as the final poem. I was trying to think of titles, and I liked it as the overall theme of the book—finding peace with yourself. [Smoke the Peace Pipe] has that meaning with me.

Sometimes we are our own worst enemies, and we have all these different parts of ourselves, which we don’t let exist at the same time. We lock-off bits, we avoid things, and we don’t see how we can feel different feelings at once; we feel like we need to be on this linear trajectory. There’s a poet named, Ijeoma Umebinyuo and she has a poem that says sometimes, “Healing comes in waves / and maybe today / the wave hits the rocks / and that’s ok” and I wanted to get that across.

I suppose the peace pipe, in terms of symbolism as well, is a link to something spiritual, nature, mother earth, and to the things that can help heal us. The peace pipe as a symbol is something really sacred, and I wanted to honor where that comes from and not use the phrase lightly. I’m really aware that the meaning and the history are not mine. And I wanted to pay tribute to [the fact] that we learn from other communities and other ways of being, other ways of knowing.

YAP: How did you choose the cover art for the chapbook?

The cover [was] designed by a tattoo artist in Scotland, Joanne Baker. She was a fine arts grad before she got into tattooing. She did one of my tattoos that was in part inspired by Rupi Kaur. I love [Joanne’s] artwork and I wanted to do it with someone British and after thinking about how we could make it work, Joanne was up for it. I sent Joanne a few poems and she came back with a few different ideas and it worked like that. She’s just an amazing artist and she had never done a book cover before so for her it was something to add to the portfolio. It felt really good to collaborate with her rather than pick an image that didn’t have any meaning for me.

YAP: 2020 has been a turbulent year in many ways. What role does poetry play in the face of an ongoing pandemic and fervent call for action against racial injustice?

I think people have had a lot of alone time whether to read or write. And linking back to poetry as therapy, poetry is definitely a way to express frustrations, fears, or keep a record of the small daily things to be grateful for. I think for me I’ve seen more impactful poetry, not around coronavirus, but more around Black Lives Matter. I’ve seen a lot of spoken word that has shown up, and I hope that stays. There are a couple poets on Instagram who I follow with minority backgrounds and some of the work they share is so inspiring it just leaves me at a loss for words. I think poetry sparks debate and conversations. And I think that’s needed whether it is because people are feeling lonely or as a way to continue to inspire us and to think about and change how we do things and move to a new normal in terms of coronavirus or a new normal around Black Lives Matter or trans rights. And none of this is new; it was just buried. The other day I was listening to a poet in the UK, Benjamin Zephaniah. He is a spoken-word/music/performance poet and he wrote a song called, “Dis Policeman Keeps On Kicking Me to Death.” And he wrote that almost 10 years ago in relation to one of his family members who had a similar death to George Floyd, but in the UK. So one story just hits the news, but it’s been happening everywhere all the time, which is really scary.

YAP: Is there a limit to how poetry gives us access to someone else’s lived experiences?

I think someone has to be in a place to hear it, especially if it’s something that challenges their world views or something that could be triggering. At spoken-word events, some people will have trigger warnings before a piece. And it’s ok that we don’t get something that someone is talking about because it is beautiful that there are so many different perspectives—as long as it’s not harmful to somebody else.

YAP: What knowledge or feelings do you hope readers gain from reading your chapbook?

To put some context to it, the trauma I refer to is related to my experience with sexual violence. I didn’t want to expand loads because trauma can come in so many different ways for people, and I wanted it to be relatable to people who have been through anything. I hope that people can know that things get better. In terms of my healing, [it has been helpful] knowing that there are other people out there who get it and that you are not alone. If it reaches one other person and that makes them realize that someone has gone through something similar, survived, and is all right, then that is really important.

There is an article in The Independent that in the UK only 1.5% of rapists that are charged by police are prosecuted by the Crown Prosecution Service. I don’t know what world we are living in, but it’s not one that feels like it takes this stuff seriously. I think systems are failing so many people. And sometimes I read stuff like that and I think about all of the people who don’t report things to the police and why would they when that’s the statistic. And why would they when a lot of the police in the system treat women like they do—because it is majority women who experience [sexual violence]. For me, it is finding alternative ways for healing when you don’t always get the response that you want from the systems around you, from the people who you would want to get criminal justice from, and from people who are close to you who don’t know how to respond. [My chapbook] is something that can say that you are not alone and there are ways you can explore this and things that you can do to start to feel better.

*****

Every writer has a story to tell and every story is worth telling. Thank you Roz and Siobhan for such an insightful conversation. Yellow Arrow Publishing is a nonprofit supporting women writers through publication and access to the literary arts.

(not) just a matchstick

The places that made me

Growth

Maybe, this is how we can make the world a better place?

Nikita Rimal Sharma

The most beautiful garden

coming April 2022

Darah Schillinger

when the daffodils die

coming July 2022

Amanda Baker

What is Another Word for Intimacy?

coming October 2022

Smoke the Peace Pipe

Subscribe to the Yellow Arrow Newsletter!